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Archive for the ‘Ordinary Time’ Category

Getting to the Dream

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , on January 30, 2013| 2 Comments »

Photo by Bill Dickinson

Photo by Bill Dickinson

Joseph had the dream as a young man, his brothers and family bowing down to them. It was a true dream. But never did he imagine the journey that would bring him to the reality of that dream. Isn’t this so often the way? Betrayal and sorrow often bring the dream.

Genesis 42:8-9Although Joseph recognized his brothers, they did not recognize him. Then he remembered his dreams about them and said to them, “You are spies! You have come to see where our land is unprotected.”

If the brothers hadn’t sold Joseph into slavery, then he couldn’t be in Egypt when Pharaoh had his dream to interpret it. If Joseph hadn’t been there, Egypt would not have prepared for famine in the same way that they did. And not only Jacob’s family would have been lost to famine, but scores and scores of people would have died.

Some will say God turned a bad thing into a good thing. And surely, that does happen. But on the grander scale, the big big picture that God sees, it appears, in hindsight, that achieving some goals (or dreams) have an arduous path. Peter Rollins wrote a book, “The Fidelity of Betrayal” which examines and expands on this concept of loss/death/betrayal preceding joy/renewal/transformation.

Some of us are lose the dream when the going gets tough: that would be me. I see myself so clearly now in this loss of confidence and direction. I look around and there is absolutely nothing that appears valuable in my quest for the dream. I am broke or caught up in a band of busyness. How could any of this end up at the dream? And the longer it goes on, the more doubt I have in the dream at all.

Oh sorrow.

I gave so many dreams because they didn’t come to fruition soon enough. I judged the time and found it lacking. So I’d build another dream and another dream and yet another. Looking for hints that one or the other dream was coming true. I was getting there. I was reaching it.

But no, the dream (the picture in my head of what the dream would look like) kept moving further away.

I am sorry now. I ask forgiveness of God for my lack of faith and fortitude. I didn’t trust the Way. I didn’t want to be a Joseph who had to be sold into slavery, wrongly accused, thrown into jail, and languish there until the moment was right. I wanted to create those moments. I wanted to control the timing. I wanted the dream my way or no way.

And so, I got my way after all. I got none of those dreams.

That’s sad except for one truth. There is another dream before me. I am, at the least, that resilient. I am not dreamless. But now, even at this age, after so many years, I can understand the importance of keeping on toward the dream, of trusting God no matter my circumstances, of believing in a future that holds the moments God creates.

I will believe.

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Promotion

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , on January 25, 2013| Leave a Comment »

cup runs overJoseph got tagged by Pharaoh for one reason only: Joseph was identified as a man of God. That was his bio in short. He had no interview and no references. Pharaoh did not ask him about his five-year plan or to discuss his strengths and weaknesses. Joseph took hold of an opportunity. He put all his eggs in one basket, God’s basket.

Genesis 41:39-40

Then Pharaoh said to Joseph, “Since God has made all this known to you, there is no one so discerning and wise as you. You shall be in charge of my palace, and all my people are to submit to your orders. Only with respect to the throne will I be greater than you.”

I am pretty sure, if Pharaoh would not have found Joseph’s dream interpretation pleasing, he would have had Joseph executed. That’s how it worked back then. But the truth resonated and so Pharaoh took pendulum and swung it the other way. Joseph was not looking for fame and fortune even. He just wanted out of prison. He got much more than he had bargained for. But all the same, he stepped up.

Have I missed these opportunities? Have I been aware of them at all? And I’m not talking about looking for a promotion. I’ve done that plenty of times. I’ve calculated what impact my work might have and would I be noticed. That’s not the way it works for the people of God. I should know that by now.

Instead, we are asked to simply be the mouthpiece of God in a particular situation, to speak with authority, but without pride, to speak with intent but without ulterior motives.

Pharaoh could have heard the interpretation of Joseph’s dream and then sent him back to prison. But Pharaoh had the power to change Joseph’s life and he did so. That’s all. It was a God moment.

And what about me? Have I ever had the power to change someone else’s life because of my position, my authority? Maybe. Maybe. Something to ponder.

Perhaps it’s time, at my age, to stop worrying about my next promotion (in either secular or spiritual worlds) and simply give promotions to others. Give a level cup of praise or hope or love. Give more than is required. Give abundantly. Give as a pharaoh to a prisoner. Give what I do have.

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Dreamers Dreaming Dreams

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , on January 18, 2013| Leave a Comment »

dreamingWe have lost the art of dreaming. I suppose we are still fantasizing about our futures. Despite my age, I am still hoping for new things to come along. I want to write and be read. I want to speak and be heard. I want to manifest holiness and thereby introduce the power of the Holy Spirit to others. I want to be happy and I want the best for my children. Those are all human dreams. No interpretation needed.

Genesis 40:8

“We both had dreams,” they answered, “but there is no one to interpret them.” Then Joseph said to them, “Do not interpretations belong to God? Tell me your dreams.”

There are dreams that come from God with a message. But mostly, dreaming and interpreting has been relegated to the New Age crowd and cast off the average person’s radar. Oh, we might engage in a little lighthearted reading of a dream book just like we occasionally read a daily horoscope. But we don’t take them seriously and we expect little from our brain’s nightly forages into that other dimension.
There is one primary test for an effective prophet–their prophecies come true. It is the same for a dream interpreter. Truly divine dreams will speak into a situation and will have more value when interpreted. I say more value because the dreamer will know the dream is unique, unlike any other nightly offering. That dream will be remembered the next day instead of fleeing as soon as the eyes and consciousness re-enter the present.
But the dreamer must take a second step to remember the dream and write it down. Write everything down as fast as possible. Add to the description as it unfolds again later in the day. Give the dream its due.
And finally, ask God for an interpretation or an interpreter.
No, dream interpreters do not put out a shingle, but God is still able to speak in a variety of ways, whether it’s dreams, dark speech (unexpected circumstances), strangers, friends, teachers, pastors, and in fact, any written or spoken word. Any of these may carry the interpretation of a Spirit gifted dream. But we must be open to the interpretation.
Before I became a follower of Christ, I had a Spirit-infused dream that frightened me. I was at a bridge whose expanse extended across a very wide river. The bridge was made of slats and did not seem very secure but I knew I had to cross it. As I started, I looked down into the waters and discovered they were not waters at all but teeming bodies, writhing and contorted and reaching out for me, some for help and others to drag me in. I wanted to run back but a man stood on the other side beckoning me to keep coming. A voice called and I turned to see another man back at the start of the bridge encouraging me back to the safety of the shore I knew. Then he laughed and I woke up.
In waking, I understood this dream and decided then to continue crossing that bridge. It was a turning point in my life.

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Is God My Today Show?

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 15, 2013| Leave a Comment »

One day This DayThe difference between Joseph and me is acceptance of today, just the way it is (not the way I think it should be). Joseph went from “favored son” to “favored slave” to “favored prisoner.” Instead of focusing on the favored part, I’d be moaning and groaning about the other transmutations. I’d be comparing now with what used to be. I’d be comparing now with my dreams. Could this day be God too?
Genesis 39: 5a, 19-21
From the time he [Potiphar] put him in charge of his household and of all that he owned, the Lord blessed the household of the Egyptian because of Joseph. . . . When his master heard [believed] the story his wife told him, saying, “This is how your slave treated me,” he burned with anger. Joseph’s master took him and put him in prison . . . But while Joseph was there in the prison, the Lord was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favor in the eyes of the prison warden.
I remember when I turned thirty (back in the day) and I was sure it was the worst day of my life. I had a litany of accomplishments that I expected to have mastered by then: successful marriage, successful career, stable income, maybe a kid, fabulous apartment, and the perfect body. Instead, I was working as a cocktail waitress in a singles bar, living in a tiny one-room cabin back in my home town (having left New York), with no boyfriend (much less a husband), and totally out of shape. Plus, the one date I did have for my “big turning thirty day” stood me up. I was a mess. God? Surely not. This could not be in God’s plan!
Looking back, of course, I can see some incredible events that happened as a result of my circumstances: the people I met, the healing between my mom and me, but mostly the discovery that I could be alone. I needed to learn who that person was (since my nature had been to define myself by others). I see God in my rear view mirror, but I couldn’t see God then.
Joseph appears to have the gifted insight, at a young age, to trust God no matter what. He took what was given and did the best he could within the parameters he was given. He worked it.
It’s time to take my head out of the sand and really look around. Every neighbor, every acquaintance, every brief encounter at work, every pet (accidents and all), every loss, every gain, every child (adult or not), every married year, every relative, every hour, day, or minute: they are all God.
Last week, I learned that one of my oldest friends (from high school days) is in the final stages of pancreatic cancer. I was so angry, Mary, the happiest one of us all, the most content, the healthiest, the most well-centered in God–she was dying? No Fair! And yet, when I spoke to her, I was immediately arrested by her Today God. She was in the now and accepted this journey just like all the other journeys.
She put me to shame without even trying. Really. Today is God. Thanks. Really, thanks for today. God.

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Doing the Right Thing

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on January 14, 2013| Leave a Comment »

integrityEveryone around me appears so sure that the Bible is a clear exposition of right and wrong, but I say it is also full “gray areas.” Tamar, betrayed by her husband’s father and brothers, tricks the father into sleeping with her. She conceives a child by him and when she is found out is called a harlot until Judah fesses up to the deed. Then she is proclaimed righteous.

Genesis 38:25-26a
As she was being brought out [to be burned to death], she sent a message to her father-in-law. “I am pregnant by the man who owns these,” she said. And she added, “See if you recognize whose seal and cord and staff these are.” Judah recognized them and said, “She is more righteous than I . . .

I understand the concept since the law of that era proclaimed that the brothers should sleep with the widow to procure children in the dead brother’s name and provide a future for the widow. Without sons to protect her, she would be cast out into the street. She would be homeless unless her own family would take her in. It was a complex solution to a societal problem — widows.

Tamar did not have many–or perhaps I should say ANY–resources to repair the damage done by Judah’s offspring. Those brothers intentionally withheld from her what she needed: the seed to create a man-child who would care for her in her old age. They, by not participating honestly in the practice, condemned her. For this, they were undoubtedly killed. They were violating basic human rights, and worse, female rights, of which there were few.

Judah withheld the third and youngest son for fear he would be killed, since he didn’t really know why, only that relations with Tamar brought death. Oh, he promised her the boy when he came of age, but it never happened.

So, Tamar pretends to be a temple prostitute.

In today’s world, this is just another soap opera or bodice ripper romance. This is the clever woman making the man own up to his responsibilities. All true. But in her world? She was taking a huge risk. All that Judah had to do, in the moment of reveal, was deny the “pledge” he gave her belonged to him. This was the same Judah, remember, who just participated in the sale of his brother Joseph.

Judah did the right thing, despite himself.

And this is the message for me then. I can always choose rightly today, even if I chose poorly yesterday and the day before that and the day before that. I can do a reversal. I can do the right thing.

In that act of bravery, God can show up. God can make the switch. God is in the now.

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Relinquishing Losses

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , on January 6, 2013| Leave a Comment »

moving onThe reunion story between Jacob and Esau is the Old Testament way of foreshadowing grace to come. Esau had every right to resent Jacob and even hate him for Jacob’s deceptions. Instead, he extended unmerited grace. Time did the first part of the healing (over twenty years) and the two brothers did the rest. They chose to let go of the past.

Genesis 33:1a, 3-4
Jacob looked up and there was Esau, coming with his four hundred men . . . He himself went on ahead and bowed down to the ground seven times as he approached his brother. But Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him; he threw his arms around his neck and kissed him. And they wept.

They didn’t talk about the past, but they both knew what had happened between them. Jacob poured out his plea through the giving of very generous gifts (220 goats, 230 sheep, 30 camels plus their young, 50 cows and bulls, and 30 donkeys). Then, when he himself came forward, he bowed down seven times (and his children likewise). This gesture in this time and culture indicated that the other person was superior. By bowing seven times, Jacob was accepting the position of vassal to Esau. (See discussion by Dr. Claude Mariottini)

Instead, like the story of the prodigal son, Esau greets his brother warmly with an embrace. We do not know if this change of heart was from the beginning when he first heard of Jacob’s coming or if Esau’s heart was touched by the gifts and Jacob’s obeisance. Nonetheless, their embrace was a willingness on Esau’s part to start over. To let go of the vows for revenge and deceptions.

But Jacob does an interesting thing. Despite Esau’s offer to accompany Jacob or leave additional men, Jacob demurs. I see this as wisdom. Their unspoken agreement is tenuous at best. It’s one thing to initiate peace but another to live it. By keeping their households apart (Jacob buys land near Shechem), they can have their understanding without putting themselves at close proximity where old habits and memories could peck away at their resolve to live amiably.

In the same way should we remember this wisdom. When we forgive, especially in those most difficult cases (abuse, brokenness, and a bevy of other human sorrows), we should not expect the heart to follow quickly. Instead, we must give space and time and new patterns to develop.

I can choose to relinquish my losses from the past, but I must still be wise in building my future.

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What Have You Done?

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , on January 2, 2013| Leave a Comment »

mistakesIt’s not really a question, though, is it? It is an accusation. The person asking has already made a judgment about the event or act and it’s a matter of drawing attention to it. Even God used this phrase against Adam and Eve? Instead of “What?” I think “Look” would be a better addition: “Look what you have done.” Wake up!

Genesis 31:25-26a
Jacob had pitched his tent in the hill country of Gilead when Laban overtook him, and Laban and his relatives camped there too. Then Laban said to Jacob, “What have you done? . . . “

Of course, in Laban’s world, everything was about him. His accusation was based on his perceived loss, not of loved ones (despite his saying so), but of his household gods and the good fortune he had had while Jacob was working for him. Laban knew that God was with Jacob and in those twenty years, he had benefited from it. With Jacob’s departure, he feared his losses. And so the phrase gets longer: Look what you have done to me?

When God said, “what have you done?” he was bringing awareness. He alone can do this. When people say it to each other, take care. It’s generally self-motivated.

Perhaps there’s a small hope in the speaker’s mind, that circumstances are not what they seem, a small hope that the beloved one did not really cheat on his/her spouse or get caught with drugs or drunk while driving. Maybe it’s a prayer: please God don’t let it be true.

But, in the end, the answer is already out there. It’s a rhetorical question really. And for that reason, don’t bother. It’s all for effect!

Here’s the really sad part. I hear this question all the time. At least, in my mind. It’s the accuser of course, not God at all. But that’s what I hear when I err. This is a question I must cast aside today. It has no healing and no awareness for me.

Instead, I choose to hear, “What will you do next?”

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