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Posts Tagged ‘mindfulness’

I love: I abstain

Posted in Time Up to Pentecost, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on May 18, 2010| Leave a Comment »

I’m not doing too well with this idea of abstaining from something . . . anything . . . just because it’s a problem for someone else. And yet, if I hold true to the concept of the “sacred other,” can I choose to do anything else?

I Corinthians 8:13
Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall.

Sometimes, these choices are a cakewalk. Obviously, if I have friends who struggle with alcoholism, I would not guzzle around them. That’s insensitive. But then, the cost to me for not drinking in their presence is minimal. But what about other things? What about movies or books that cause my conservative friends to stumble? What about eating meat around my vegetarian/vegan friends? What about wearing dresses instead of pants around traditional Mennonites or Amish?

There are such fine lines between being true to oneself, being a chameleon for the sake of fitting in, and choosing to abstain out of concern for the other.

I believe my previous “unconsciousness” in these choices were the ultimate problem. I might abstain but I did not do it out of love, but with resentment and even negative judgments.

It’s a type of reluctant obedience that is no better than just going ahead and doing it.

And yet, Jesus stretched a lot of observers to places they did not want to go. He ate without ritual washing, he allowed sinners to touch him, he healed and touched contagious disease. He broke Jewish laws with knowledge but also with kindness.

It all comes back to love and motive. Abstaining for the sake of another should be conscious and intentional. And probably, that act should be accompanied by conversation.

Keep me mindful today Lord.

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Keep Your Distance

Posted in Time Up to Pentecost, tagged , , , , , , , on April 7, 2010| Leave a Comment »

I am too much like the little girl who doesn’t listen to her mother, “Stay away from the stove.” Instead, I wait until I get burned before the lesson sinks in. Simply put: I am overly confident in my ability to resist evil.

Romans 16:17b-18
Keep away from them. For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites. By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people.

I don’t consider myself naive, but honestly, am I any better at dodging flattery than anyone else? Flattery is a strong lure for performance-oriented folks like me. We are working so diligently at “getting things done” and long-anticipated approval that we often mistake honeyed words for bona fide appreciation. We can be seduced.

That’s embarrassing, but true.

The best antidote is right here: avoid those people and situations. This advice is really in the same family as “if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” I’m not very good at that one either.

As I contemplate this simple truth, I realize the main element is self-control. If I just stop and “look before I leap,” or “hold my tongue,” or “wait for the Lord;” each of these cliches could manifest a difference. The decision is internal and it’s made in the moment. It requires mindfulness.

Help me step back today and really see; really hear. Help me to breathe in wisdom. Help me to recognize evil intent.

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How Did I Get Here?

Posted in Advent, tagged , , , , , , on December 8, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Acts 19:32b
“… Most of the people did not even know why they were there.”

How many times have I looked around and asked myself how I ended up in a particular situation? Sometimes, it’s a crowd thing, to be sure, just being caught up in the synergy of the thing and suddenly, there I am, in the midst of a mass of people who are shouting and carrying signs. I’m not shouting; I’m not carrying a sign. I’ve just realized where I am and I don’t want to be there, but how do I extricate myself?

Some of these things have happened because I didn’t stop to really think. I just went along for the ride not realizing where the ride might lead me. This is usually a type of teen behavior. I should know better.

I remember my first marriage. I was only eighteen and when I accepted that proposal of marriage, never did I realize that I would be caught up in a whirlwind that would not stop. And so, on that fateful day as I walked down the aisle, I knew I was making a mistake. But it was too late and I was not brave enough to be a “runaway bride.”

I remember going up to Toronto when the Toronto Blessing was big news and people were flying in from all over the world to experience this “new wave” of the Spirit. It was all so exciting until I found myself standing on a line with hundred and hundreds of other people waiting for someone to come along and pray for me with the expectation that I would be “slain in the spirit” and fall backward (they also provided catchers). Now, I know that being slain in the spirit can happen, it has happened to me once or twice and I went from upright to flat on the ground, with no catcher, no injuries, and thoroughly blessed. But my Toronto encounter was a conveyor belt and I wondered what I was doing there.

The list of these “where am I” experiences is long. Did someone tell me ahead of time? Did someone try to stop me? Did someone warn me? Unfortunately, I don’t remember that part. I was always too caught up in the moment, in the crowd, in the momentum.

As a parent, I am trying to be that voice of caution or “reality check” for my teenagers. They’re not listening either. Instead, they are calling me a “bubble breaker” who pricks the balloons of excitement and enthusiasm for a project.

But following a momentum without really thinking doesn’t just happen to teenagers. We are all guilty of not looking at all sides of a situation. It can be something as simple as raiding the grocery store for milk, eggs, and bread at the slightest hint that there may be a snowstorm. It can be showing up at a county council meeting to scream about taxes or budget cuts. It can be passing along an email or a blog post that is caustic or crude or downright wrong.

How do we get into these situations? We don’t take time to think… to pray… to consider the consequences of our actions. We lose courage in the face of the crowd, the group voice, the assumptions of righteousness.

Lord, give me a heart of courage this day. Give me sensitivity to your voice, your Spirit. And above all, give me mindfulness.

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