Photo by Victoria Potter
James 1:19b-20
Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s [and woman’s] anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.
I think of anger as a bus because it’s always taking me somewhere, and rarely if ever, does it take me where I want to go or where I should be. It’s not always a bus; I also ride the anger subway, the anger jet and the anger canoe. Each one goes a different speed, but the results are the same.
And most of those trips leave a wake or trail of damage that takes much longer to repair than it does to destroy.
When I lived in New York, I took the subway a lot. At first, it was confusing and I’d have to watch the map and keep checking the walls for the name of the stop. But pretty soon, I got so accustomed to the subway that I knew where I was just by the look of the station.
Just because anger is familiar doesn’t make it a good thing. I know that intellectually.
I know that “anger management” talks about transforming feelings of anger into healthy expressions, like assertiveness or redirecting it into some kind of constructive behavior, or intentionally and rationally calming oneself down. I’m sure these are all good mechanisms and I should look into them.
But I would like to get better at catching the moment BEFORE I get on the bus. What is it that makes me want to jump. One of my previous pastors said it was “fear” and I can certainly agree with that in many cases: fear of loss, self-esteem, worth, value, control, etc. I think there are other moments too that are driven by something else than fear. Maybe it’s disappointment.
I have written and talked about the power of disappointment before, particularly in women. It’s wrapped up in expectations and hopes and dreams and when that disappointment comes, particularly repetitive disappointment, I think it mutates into anger: displaced, misplaced, and often illogical in appearance.
No easy solution, but certainly, the advice from James is sound: be slow to speak. Maybe, just maybe, if I could slow the process down, just a little, I could recognize my triggers.
Meditations from Zion 
Loved this post, Irm! I especially appreciated your word pictures for anger transportation. Never thought of it that way. You are so right; anger is never stationery. I once was so angry, I didn’t know what to do with myself! In desperation, I cried out to God, letting Him know (what He already knew, of course) that this was too big for me and He was going to have to deal with it for me. It was a miracle, how in a few minutes, He took my anger and it was gone! The angry me would have chewed on that offense for days, floating along in the “anger canoe” with a death grip like an angry dog! Praise God for that turning point in my life!
Great Word Picture! I will shamelessly steal it for next sermon on anger!
Fr Jeffrey W
Thanx. Go for it. IB
Sent from my Verizon Wireless Phone
Then there’s that “righteous anger.” That’s no bus, it’s a bullet train with no exits!
I always worry about that “righteous anger” phrase: is it real? Do we justify outrages by Jesus anger in the temple? I do agree … it’s definitely a bullet train. LOL.
Anger… I know that one well. It creeps up on me as my initial response to anything disappointing, or “bad” that happens in my life. Anger steals my joy and demands all my attention. I get angry easily. Why? I could blame it on my Father’s predisposition to reacting in anger, or a quick temper, but when it comes down to it, my anger comes out of unrealistic expectations that I place on all of those around me, even those whom I don’t even know. I expect people to be respectful and considerate of me at all times. Selfish? Perhaps. Prideful? Possibly. Fear? Most definitely. Fear of Failure or lost relationships or Self-worth… It all does come down to fear. It doesn’t take much for me to become angry, does that mean I am always fearful? I’m not sure. Someone honking at me from behind or driving too slow holding me up from getting to where I need to be makes me angry. Someone who lies to me, lets me down, or hurts me in anyway is subject to my anger. Why do I get so angry easily? What am I really afraid of? I guess that’s something I need to ask God and wait paitently for an answer.