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Archive for the ‘Lent’ Category

Grateful for Grace

Posted in Lent, tagged , , , , , , , , , on March 9, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Photo of Graced with Light art installation by Anne Patterson

Photo of Graced with Light art installation by Anne Patterson

It’s a big deal, the blood of Jesus. The shedding of this particular “lamb’s blood” became the ultimate conciliation of humankind to God.

We had blown it again and again. Symbolically, through the Old Testament stories, one failure after another, whether it was Adam & Eve, or the generation of Noah, or the forty years wandering in the desert. People continued to kick against the ways of God, the very path laid out for them through the Law. But we humans could not follow without failure, missteps, selfish choices, and lies. We had a lousy track record.

So overflowing is his kindness toward us that he took away all our sins through the blood of his Son, by whom we are saved; and he has showered down upon us the richness of his grace—for how well he understands us and knows what is best for us at all times. [Ephesians 1:7-8, Living Bible]

God sent many human prophets to warn the people. And for a season, they would straighten up and fly right, but within a generation or two, we took the stubborn road. God changed his tactics: he went for an inside/out method since the outside/in method did not work.

Change the heart and the actions and righteous behaviors would follow; renew the inner man/woman and they might willingly surrender to God’s way. For this reason, I suppose, we were all offered grace abundantly. Jesus was grace. Jesus is grace personified. Grace is our salvation.

How can I be anything but grateful for this covering? Oh yes, I am grateful for grace.

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Thanks, I Mean It

Posted in Grief, Lent, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on March 8, 2015| Leave a Comment »

grateful heartSaying “thank you” should not be just a polite expression or automated response. When the words come from the heart, they can germinate and roots will strengthen them. The words sound differently when they bubble up from the truth center of our selves, and as a result, they have the power to reach into the hearts of others. True thanksgiving is compelling. But, ya gotta mean it.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. [I Thessalonians 5:16-18, NIV] and The Lord does look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. [I Samuel 16:7b, NIV]

When expressing thanks to another person, I think it’s important to make eye contact to reveal one’s intent, an acknowledgment and appreciation for the efforts of another. It is an I/Thou interaction. Another way of saying this: when a person feels thanks and shares that thankfulness with another, there is an exchange of energy and recognition, much like saying, “I see you and you see me.” It is the simplest form of gratefulness.

surrender 1God asks no less. Acknowledge Me, appreciate what I-God has given to You-Human, celebrate gratefulness, and express all of it with thanks. Trust Me.

No doubt, when circumstances are difficult, I tend to withhold thanks. I make assumptions and judgments: no, not this, no, this is a bad day, no, this is a bad choice, no, this is too sad, no, this is too painful. And so I reject the situation and look for another. I decide on my own that this is not the way I want to go, that this can’t be the path God intended me to take. I’m outta here.

But there is more loss; I’ve missed important lessons along the way because I ran, I eluded, I buried my head in the sand.

aloneI am facing such a time again, this newly minted widowhood. Can I find an inner thanks, a genuine “yes” to God, despite the tears, the loss, and the anxieties? Can I surrender into gratefulness? Can I fight off disappointment?

Little by little. Little by little. I must. I can. I will.

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Measurements

Posted in Lent, tagged , , , , , , on March 7, 2015| Leave a Comment »

One of the biggest mistakes people make in planning a project is that they rarely figure out how to measure their success (or failure). How do you measure your progress? When we were children, many of our parents measured our growth by marks on a door frame. Up and up and up the pencil marks would go. But what about our spiritual lives? Can we measure our growth, our commitment, or our change?

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. [Luke 6:38-39, NIV]

measureAre we using the money we give as a measure of our commitment or our sacrifice in the things of God? I am not saying this is a good thing or bad one, I’m just asking.

In the “world,” more often than not, it’s the norm: “He who dies with the most toys wins.” It’s a kind of joke, a bumper sticker that had it’s day some years back, and yet, the accumulation of wealth and stuff continues. Western cultures, particular, measure by salaries, investments, houses and neighborhoods, travel and vacations, labels, and let us not forget, cars.

I remember the embarrassment I felt when my half-sister (twenty years my senior) from Estonia had an opportunity to visit us in our home and she was befuddled as to why we had rooms in which their primary function was to sleep. She, with her three room apartment, no running hot water and a wood stove for cooking, raised a child and later housed that same adult child, his wife, and their two children. Every room, every inch of their apartment was multi-purpose.

The other day, I looked outside my front door and saw five cars parked outside our house. Every adult in our home has his or her own car.

all inSo, let me get back to the question of measuring the depth of the soul.

Am I really sold out to Christ, am I all in? Who would know? How do I know? Is it because I tithe now or attend services faithfully or volunteer each week? Are these viable measures? Or perhaps it’s the minutes I pray or read the Bible? Perhaps I memorize verses or know how to open my Bible to the chapter and verse without too much flipping. Perhaps I have kept score of the number of people who have come to Christ by my witness, my story, my relationships?

Being a believer or follower of Christ is not like getting a black belt in Tae Kwan Do or judo. There are no tangible tests.

It’s a way and a journey. It’s a marriage of sorts. It’s an intimacy. And each one is unique and different. So, why do we do all these things, these activities, these measurements? Because people have discovered through the years that our relationship with God can be enhanced. But honestly, it’s a bit of a crap shoot. But maybe, just maybe, this or that practice, will open the door wide to your heart and soul, and once it’s fully open, the Holy Spirit fills you.

And at that point, you simply are, because of I AM and you are bound. And all that is done is a natural outgrowth of that relationship. The surprise comes in the paradox. Give to receive, die to live.

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Budgeting God’s Stuff

Posted in Lent, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 6, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Stock PhotosBelieve it or not, but I’ve only recently gotten into the budget business (now, when I say recently, I’m referring to the last two years). And I say that because my husband had no interest whatsoever in managing money. It was either feast or famine at our house: we had money (so we spent it) or we didn’t (so we charged it). Eventually, we dug ourselves in a pretty big hole. About two years ago, we did the Dave Ramsay workshop and Mike actually agreed to go. I was so grateful that the first session spent a lot of time on the importance of married couples working on budgets together. As a result, for a season, Mike and I actually talked about money and PLANNED how we would spend the money we expected to have that month. It was not easy. But we discovered this: we had to prioritize. Greg McKeown, author of Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less, writes that we all have a choice, either we can choose to prioritize our lives, or someone else will.

offeringBut you will cross the Jordan and settle in the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance, and he will give you rest from all your enemies around you so that you will live in safety. Then to the place the Lord your God will choose as a dwelling for his Name—there you are to bring everything I command you: your burnt offerings and sacrifices, your tithes and special gifts, and all the choice possessions you have vowed to the Lord. And there rejoice before the Lord your God . . . [Deuteronomy 12:10-12a, NIV]

Actually, everything we have is God’s, we are simply using the resources while we’re here.

Mike and I had to really look at our lives, our habits to decide what was most important and how would we spend God’s resources. We also had to confess that we had squandered much along the way. Oh, the grace of God. It’s never too late. What all of this soul searching meant was an examination of lifestyle.

Like the parable of the talents [Matthew 25:14-30], we are each given the responsibility to use what we have and to give thanks for it, whether big or small. How should we divide them?  “Much will be demanded from everyone who has been given much, and from the one who has been entrusted with much, even more will be asked.” [Luke 12:48b, CEB]

In the case of most Americans, particularly compared to the world’s population, we have been given much. Forgive us Father, for the abuse of your bounty, for our wastefulness, and our pride. Forgive me for still holding too tightly to possessions, for surely, in the face of death, they mean very little.

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Giving is Paying Forward

Posted in Grief, Lent, tagged , , , , , , , , , on March 5, 2015| 1 Comment »

Toll 05192008 cdbToday, within my Lenten Devotional for 2015, I shared a poem I found on the Internet called Pennsylvania Turnpike by Shawn Self because he expresses so well a small but significant experience when someone paid it forward for him, just for him. We never know when a small gesture might change a life.

You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. [Matthew 5:38-42, NIV]

We can’t always know where the giving will lead. When Mike died, there was a stream of giving that I could not have fathomed. People with whom I rarely socialize, came out of the proverbial woodwork, and stepped into the chaos with their gifts of time, money, food, and even a mop and bucket to clean up the floor where Mike fell. Another group of people took my dogs into their homes and another set drove a total of eight hours in the middle of the night to pick me up and bring me home from New York. Another group wrapped their arms around my young adult children who never, ever imagined that would encounter death in this way. Each and every person paid it forward. To this day, my gratefulness is beyond measure. And the giving has not stopped in these ten weeks of sorrow. dog and horse

Every time we “pay” it forward by giving in the moment, for the moment, God is in it. Don’t hold back. This could be the day your action, like the rudder of a ship, turns a life around.

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It’s a Bloody Business

Posted in Grief, Lent, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on March 4, 2015| Leave a Comment »

blood of JesusLife patterns change in the face of death. It is rare that a death would have no impact, but it’s possible in the case of a lonely soul, a homeless person. And yet, even they, once discovered, impact the finders. So, now I can’t think of an example of a death not causing some ripples in the fabric of life.

Practically everything in a will hinges on a death. That’s why blood, the evidence of death, is used so much in our tradition, especially regarding forgiveness of sins. [Hebrews 9:22 +/-, The Message]

In Judaeo-Christian traditions, death, symbolized by the shedding of blood, marked covenants and promises, as well as standing in as a symbolic gesture for the forgiveness of transgressions. Blood is a powerful conceptualization and its significance is lost on no one. We all know that without blood, the body cannot survive. Breath is good but blood is life-giving and sustaining.

And most of us understand that the death of Jesus was intended as the ultimate sacrifice, that of God’s son (or God in human form) for the sake of humanity. The death of Jesus changed his followers; the resurrection of Jesus changed the world. Jesus accepted his mission and willingly gave all that he had to give, from power to heal to direct access to God to forgiveness of sins and mistakes for eternity.

SONY DSCThe death of Jesus is a macro event. In my own life, our family has experienced what may seem like a micro event in the face of a dying deity, and yet Mike’s death has changed us all, significantly. We are all seeing more clearly what is important and what matters. When people say “don’t sweat the small stuff,” I never realized before how much small stuff is really out there. I have been majoring in non-essentials. Even my young adult children have shed much of the clutter in their lives and squeezed several years of maturing into a few months. We will never the be the same.

But really, is anyone the same after someone has sacrificed on our behalf? All are affected, the one who gives and the one who receives. Sacrifice is not easy.

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Generously Seriously

Posted in Lent, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 3, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Widows-MiteIt’s not really about the amount we give; instead, generosity is often measured by the cost to the giver to give it [hint: as in “sacrifice”]. In other words, it is some part of the story about the woman who gave only two coins, her last two coins, and she was cited for being far more generous than the rich men who gave out of their abundance. [Luke 21:1-4]

In the midst of a very severe trial, their overflowing joy and their extreme poverty welled up in rich generosity. For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. . . . They gave themselves first of all to the Lord, and then by the will of God also to us. [2 Corinthians 8:2-3, 5b, NIV]

As a believer for many years, I have been around the bend several times about giving and tithing. As a baby Christian, although I loved Jesus dearly, I was church-skeptical. Why should I give them my money? How will they use it? How can I trust them to use it wisely? (So self-righteous, as though I was using my funds well. Hardly.)

Then I went through a period of legalism where I tried to follow the letter of the scriptures, from purity to tithing; I was determined to please God, to perform superbly. And perhaps, if I was very good and very faithful and very exacting, I could become a super Christian and perform miracles for God. Forgetting of course, that we all fall short of the glory of God [Romans 3:23].

money pressueShortly after that, I began to follow various teachers and did my best to align my understanding of the intentions of God with their explanations. I became a kind of disciple, from teachers who garnered thousands in arenas to popular television evangelists. It was during this time that I met my husband, who I put through the paces of meeting my mother and getting her approval, etc. (it was a Gothard thing, for the folks who remember him). And yet, we were engaged in 3 days and married in 4 months. I think it was all that “purity” talk that put us on a fast track.

As a couple, we started out in a more traditional setting in Mike’s home church. The people were kind enough, but there was little fire. I had been introduced to contemporary praise and worship by then and a traditional service felt wanting. The whole giving thing went to a back burner as newlyweds and he had never practiced tithing.

Thetake-the-plungen, we found another church and our faith exploded through the body of believers, the anointed pastor, and the call to service. Here we gave willingly and for the first time, even sacrificially, of our money and our time. We trusted God and we trusted them. We also discovered several Cursillo-type para-church organizations that moved yet closer and closer to Christ, and another outlet for giving. Such joy.

When we came to Maryland, we continued in our love and faith, but we were being challenged to give where we knew no one. Again, the distrust from old came rearing its head.

Around this time, I was challenged by the remarkable story of Jackie Pullinger who went alone, in her zeal, to Hong Kong in 19giving to poor66 (and still remains) where she made a powerful impact. But what stayed with me the most from one of her sermons was her story of giving without reserve to the poor. A visiting friend chastised her saying that the man to whom she gave money would probably spend it unwisely, and she said that her Christ instructed her to give; what happened to funds afterwards was God’s problem.

And with that, we began to tithe faithfully, ten percent, as written.

habitsBut, then, the challenges to our commitment began: the costly adoptions, a new house, travel to family far away, and so on. And although we gave consistently, I would not say it was generous of us at all. Not really. We were doing good things, serving, and going on mission trips, of course. But we simply got out of the habit. Like anything else, the longer you do (or stop doing) something, the more natural & comfortable it feels.

Restore Church

Finally, Mike and I found ourselves at our current church, Restore Church, right in our small Maryland town. The love for the people and the pastor was an updated experience of our Atlanta days. But we were also being challenged to consider giving generously, not comfortably. A few months before Mike’s death, we committed to tithing again. And God blessed our decision immediately, with a light shining out of the financial morass we had made.

oneNow, with Mike gone, our family financial situation is tenuous at best, but I am in this one mind: God is the author of my journey, which now is missing my life’s mate, but God is God and so, this is the new way. I have an inner conviction that I cannot shake that I must trust God more than ever, tithe and even give above that tithe, because I am no longer my own, but God’s and God is my essential one priority.

 

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