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Archive for the ‘Random Thoughts’ Category

Post-Covid Ten Commandments

Posted in Lectionary, Lent, Random Thoughts, tagged , , , , on March 7, 2021| 2 Comments »

Father James, our priest at St. John’s Episcopal, was delighted that the diocese announced we could do socially distanced, in-person services this month, as long as our infection rate was below 5% in the county. Hurrah!

Today’s lectionary highlighted Exodus 20 and the ten commandments and Father’s message compared the timing of the Israelites released from Egypt toward the Promised Land to our “release” from the confines of Covid to gathering together once more. In essence, from death to a type of resurrection, but with some boundaries. The ten commandments were boundaries and best practices for the Israelites. We, too, must remain conscientious about our new freedoms. It’s not over yet.

But for me, I decided to have some fun with this idea and take it one step further.

The Post Covid Ten Commandments.

  1. God is sovereign and whether that is hard to accept in the midst of much suffering, it is still true. If we can acknowledge that God is still God, there will always be hope.
  2. We should take care not to shift our focus away from God and onto less reliable idols. Yes, the vaccine is a good thing, but it still has limitations. Be wise and continue to mask up, wash our hands, and social distance–for now.
  3. We cannot place blame on God for evil in the world or use God as a scapegoat. No name calling.
  4. Remember, now that we have more freedom, we should not go hog wild. We still need days of rest. Try for one out of seven, at least.
  5. Take care of our parents and grandparents and anyone else who is elderly. Their wisdom should be protected as well as their bodies.
  6. Don’t kill hopefulness; people need to hold onto something positive right now.
  7. Don’t betray our friends by exposing them unnecessarily. Be faithful.
  8. Don’t cheat the line if we don’t need to. Be patient while waiting for our turns to get the vaccine.
  9. Don’t lie. Speak our truth in love. Not everyone will agree with us, but be authentic.
  10. Don’t begrudge others’ health. Respect our neighbors. Rejoice with those who are rejoicing. Weep with those who weep.

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Light Switch Faith

Posted in Ordinary Time, Random Thoughts, Spiritual formation, tagged , , , on February 15, 2021| Leave a Comment »

When Jesus was giving a hard lesson on forgiveness, the disciples paled (so I imagine).

“Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.” The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!” [Luke 17:4-5]

And then he gave the now-famous (or infamous) line about mustard seed faith. For the first time, as I reread this passage, I heard a smile in Jesus’ voice, almost like a little tease. I had a startling discovery. Faith is a lot more like a light switch than a thermometer. We aren’t really supposed to be in the business of “heating up” our faith. The amount of faith is not measurable in that way. How many years have I sat under teaching in which believers were chastised for not having enough faith to experience God, either in healing or miracles or whatever? But now, I’m thinking otherwise. Faith is or faith isn’t. (Another kind of Yoda phrase indeed.)

Certainly, I can gain more understanding and I can enrich my relationship to the Holy, but does that mean my faith is more or just includes something else? If I go back to my first days as a believer, I can remember the glories of my conviction about Jesus, God, and the Holy Spirit. Real. All real. I was in a whirlwind of gratitude and love. I turned on the light. But as I continued my journey of faith, I don’t believe the light got brighter, I just opened more doors. I surrendered.

I feel a great relief really. I don’t have to collect mustard seeds. I’m gonna plant the one I have so that it can die and transform into a living, breathing me/God union.

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The Dilemma of Longing

Posted in Dilemma Series, Ordinary Time, Random Thoughts, tagged , , , , , , , , on September 24, 2020| Leave a Comment »

Psalm 143:6
I stretch out my hands to You;
My soul longs for You, as a parched land. Selah.

Certainly, when it comes to scripture and to God, there is no greater thirst than the desire for God, to taste and see, to know and to be known. That is, if we recognize the source of our yearning. In discussion on this topic today, I was reminded of the fragility of our understanding. My friend said, in essence, that she believes longing for God is planted within all of us and that we are all, in one way or another, searching to return to who we are meant to be, in communion with God. How this resonated with me.

But what happens when we don’t know the source or true nature of what we are desiring or yearning to know? What if that longing is corrupted along the way? What if the idols of our world or the temporary “feel good” moments clamor to become the objects of our desire?

How many men and women have allowed sex to fill that void, or power, or success?

Longing is usually accompanied by vulnerability. In the language of faith, that is a good thing. Our hearts and spirits open to the Presence of God, we hear God’s “voice,” holy words are revealed in scripture, and we are willing to surrender–“Thy will be done.” But if our longing is misdirected and we are vulnerable as well, then we may find ourselves abused, physically or emotionally. We mistake sex for love, power for influence, and success for self-discovery.

In human psychology, longing is considered a “secondary” emotion, usually associated with the primary emotions of love and sadness. Often, longing is looking for a change. I love you, but I long for you to love me. I am sad, but I long for you to change so I won’t be sad anymore.

In my mind, the only truly safe place to put our longings is in God. When focus on other human beings, we move out of alignment. Like a car, we can still move forward, but with each mile, we become more and more damaged.

I long for a world where peace and justice and kindness reign. I long for understanding and trust and renewal. I long for unity. But my current ideas or thoughts about how our cultural losses can be undone, are misplaced. I have missed the point. No state of being can be mandated. No human law will change the course that is being set today through abused longings. Too many of us are looking for results before we look for the source of our fractures. We ignore our interdependence and play the “blame game.” We have become like two fans on separate sports teams “praying” to win. Whose prayers will God hear? Both and neither, because we are longing for the wrong result.

Let them give thanks to the Lord’s unfailing love
    and wonderful deeds for humankind,
for God satisfies the thirsty
    and fills the hungry with good things. (Ps 109-8-9, NIV, pronoun edits my own)

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The Dilemma of Religion

Posted in Dilemma Series, Random Thoughts, tagged , , , , , , on September 3, 2020| Leave a Comment »

Religious symbols

Yesterday, two friends and I discussed the word “religion.” The three of us have been working on “personal creeds” as an exercise in spiritual practice. After all, what do we believe? Is there more for us beyond the Nicene or Apostles’ Creed? Does it matter? And, is this creed-building an aspect of religion?

Librarian that I am, I looked up the definition. Webster’s has a few choices: a personal set or institutionalized system of religious attitudes, beliefs, and practices; a cause, principle, or system of beliefs held to with ardor and faith; and, for interest’s sake, an archaic meaning: scrupulous conformity or “conscientiousness.” A thoughtful addition to all of these definitions comes from Wikipedia, “The word religion is sometimes used interchangeably with faith, belief system or sometimes set of duties; however, in the words of Émile Durkheim, religion differs from private belief in that it is “something eminently social.” That resonates with me.

Religion has gotten a rather bad “rap” these days, primarily because of people who are using it to practice exclusivity. On one hand, they claim that everyone is welcome into their club, but that welcome only lasts as long as one follows the doctrine, the rules, the agreed upon credo. And yes, it is a social interaction. For many years, I learned to use the right language, to ignore the anti-whatever of the day, and to pretend I didn’t watch adult movies or read the Harry Potter series.

I remember attending churches where the word “religion” was used dismissively, as though, their worship ways were higher or “spirit-led” and therefore unbounded by the rigidity of religion. And yet, over time, these free spirits ended up with an “order of worship” and a belief statement and lines drawn in the sand. Often, the Bible, as a whole, is used as a standard, calling on the inerrancy of scripture as the foundation for everything. But, isn’t that religion?

I remember attending a church unlike my charismatic beginnings for about three years. Liturgical and systematic, every week’s service was codified and several passages from the book of prayer were repeated each week. This form of worship is often derided as “dead.” But, in the end, it was not the liturgy that drove us away, it was the people who said, in more ways than one, “we don’t do that here.”

Religion is an overarching term that encapsulates the way we choose to worship and what we believe. Just within the “Christian” religion, there are 6 major mega-blocs (according to http://www.philvaz.com/apologetics/a106.htm and The World Christian Encyclopedia [WCE], people who identify themselves as Independents, Protestants, Marginals, Orthodox, Catholic, and Anglicans.) Within those blocs, the WCE has identified 33,000 denominations. Each one slightly different in practice. Is there any wonder that people fall away? We’ve managed to make it all so very complicated.

Judaism has managed to keep the number around six or seven while Islam appears to have only two. I’m sure there are other minor differences there too of which I am unaware, but honestly, the comparison is noteworthy.

Religion, in and of itself, is not a bad word. In fact, it’s a very broad term, much like a forest. The trees and plants that make up that forest are varied and beautiful, useful and ornamental. But they are all part of the forest. And it’s the forest that helps keep us alive.

What do you believe?

 

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Truth or a Lie?

Posted in Random Thoughts on August 27, 2020| 3 Comments »

Decades ago, I was challenged by a fellow student in acting school to read the New Testament. It was a kind of “double-dog-dare;” he said any great actress should have a working knowledge of this text. He laid one proviso before me: read it the way we were instructed to read play scripts with this preamble: “if this were true” and make no judgments before reaching the end.

And so it was on December 24, 1973, after much gift giving and good cheer at my brother’s townhouse, that I read the last words of the Book of Revelation, “Even so, come, Lord Jesus. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen.” [I quote the King James Version as that was the translation I had at hand, a Gideon Bible, snatched from a hotel room by my roommate at the time.]

What was my answer? Was this text the truth or a lie? Certainly, I didn’t agree with every word. I had been living a cavalier life, like so many of us at that time in New York (drugs, sex and alcohol). But, was the essence, the core of what I read, true? Even Paul, in the 9th chapter of Romans caught me with plain speaking, “I say the truth in Christ, I lie not, my conscience also bearing me witness in the Holy Ghost–”

I surrendered to this core truth; I trusted that the stuff I didn’t understand would be made clear in the future. But for that moment, I put my faith in Christ and promised to follow Jesus and his words, and as best I could, his example. When I told my mother of my decision the next morning, Christmas morning, she laughed and said, “this too will pass.” But it didn’t. I am still here, in the arms of Christ.

I share this story again because our country is at an impasse. We are living in a time of hyperbole (extravagant exaggeration) and name calling. People use terms for concepts they barely understand and make accusations based on inference and media commentary. Both sides of our political sphere claim to speak the truth while the other side lies. How is this possible? I have personally been lambasted for my opinions or, at best, implicated as a dupe. And, honestly, I am equally guilty of doing the same.

With a palpable fear, I project a picture of our nation’s fate in November and December. If we continue on this path, no matter who wins the 2020 presidential election, there will be civil unrest and undoubtedly, much violence and innocent deaths. We will make the stories of the McCoys and Hatfields or the families of Romeo and Juliet, merely charming. Is this what we, as a people, really want?

So must we, call a truce

Christmas Truce 1914

“On December 7, 1914, Pope Benedict XV suggested a temporary hiatus of the war for the celebration of Christmas. The warring countries refused to create any official cease-fire, but on Christmas the soldiers in the trenches declared their own unofficial truce.” [https://www.history.com/topics/world-war-i/christmas-truce-of-1914] This cease-fire was done by the troops on the front lines, not the generals or politicians.

If we want to survive, we must, as Americans all, call for a truce and cross no-man’s land with a dove. What do we share in common? How are we alike? Love can still win, but we must choose to engage civilly, to remember that we are on the front lines and it is we who will suffer the most if this war of words continues to escalate beyond reason.

Most of us know how we will vote by now. Let us use our time and energy to pray for one another, not to accuse or badger. Choose your understanding of truth, but remember, the “devil is in the details.”

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Lessons from a Broken Wrist

Posted in Eastertide, Random Thoughts, Spiritual formation, tagged , , , , , , , on May 15, 2019| Leave a Comment »

Scripture is clear:
“Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved, for You are my praise.”—Jeremiah 17:14

And yet, there’s no magic here. In fact, it’s a process just like everything else. What have I learned in the last eight and a half weeks?

  1. The pain is real. And honestly, I’m not even talking about the initial breaks. I’m talking about this healing process. Most people ask, is it getting better? I guess. I can do a little more, move more, and it only hurts part of the time, not all of the time. That’s progress. I’ll not mention the ice pick jabs that stop me in my tracks.
  2. It’s slow. I mean painfully slow. After eight weeks, I only have to wear my brace at night but now I’m supposed to voluntarily move my hand and wrist. Each effort is a test: does it still hurt? See point one.
  3. The healing is not observable. In fact, I think my wrist looks like something leftover from a Frankensteinian procedure. There’s some weird things going on inside my skin: the tendons are tormented, the nerves are shaken, the bone is unyielding. The outer skin is poor camouflage to what is happening inside.
  4. Limitations are numerous. I suppose there is improvement here, after all, I can wash my own hair, put on deodorant, and snap my bra. Breakthroughs. But not for many weeks on the front end and the last thing I wanted to do was ask for help. But I see the truth of it. The initial pain is simply too much to bear alone. I had to confess to my restrictions, my body imposed prohibitions.
  5. Inertia prevailed. Exercise? Forget it. Productivity? No chance. Typing? Be still my hands. Field trips or escapades? Not hardly. The bed drew me mostly. I wasn’t just tired in my body, I was tired in my mind. I didn’t want to think about my injury. I still don’t, not really.

So where is the good news? The list is the same as always: patience, trust, gentleness with oneself, and a sense of humor. This is tortoise territory (as in the tortoise and the hare); slow and steady wins the race.

But the last thing I want to share is that these lessons are the same for the heart. If anyone has experienced a broken heart, the symptoms are probably the same, as well as the “solution.”

Time heals, God heals. That’s a promise. But it’s still up to each one of us to walk it.

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From Here, Where?

Posted in Ordinary Time, Random Thoughts, tagged , , , , , , , , on September 1, 2018| 2 Comments »

Since I retired in December, I’ve been traveling quite a bit. I felt a rare freedom to go and do as I wanted. I have been to Zambia, to California and the Pacific Coast Highway, Denver, Estonia, and even back home to Indianapolis for a 50th high school reunion. Gods timeEach place has a story and now a memory. But it’s time to take a breath. A real breath. It’s time to examine “here.”

In some ways, I sound a bit like my 91 year old mother, just months before she died, she wondered aloud, “What should I do for the rest of my life?” She still felt she had something to give and something to do. But for her, it was a dis-ease with her present.

I want to change that pattern. Before I venture into too many tomorrows, I want a better assessment of today.

I don’t want my next day to come out of a place of dissatisfaction, as though this moment is wanting. I desire this day to be full of the awareness of God and a confidence in the Holy Spirit within to enrich my inner being.

This week, I have been chewing on Henri Nouwen’s book, Spiritual Formation : Following the Movements of the Spirit. As he says, it is time to convert chronological time into “kairos” or God’s time, where “past, present, and future merge in the present moment. . . The spiritual life, therefore, is not a life that offers a few good moments between the many bad ones, but an abundant life that transforms all moments of time into windows through which the invisible becomes visible.”

Jesus was able to “be” in any setting with every person because He could “see” beyond the surface of what he/she presented to the world. Just as the doctor can hear the beating heart through a stethoscope, Jesus could hear and see the fluttering soul.

Where is just another Here.

Well, that sounds a little bit like my old favorite show, Kung Fu, and me speaking like an Eastern mystic. That makes me laugh, Grasshopper.

But seriously, some pieces are falling into place and I am experiencing a type of contentment that I have not known before. From here, I will find my way.

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