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Do me a favor

December 28, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

Doing or giving favors sounds like a good thing and yet, as soon as it’s done in the political arena, it’s dark and convoluted. Instead of extending good will alone, it also carries an expectation of paybacks. Am I doing any better than this?

Acts 25:9
Festus, wishing to do the Jews a favor, said to Paul, “Are you willing to go up to Jerusalem and stand trial before me there on these charges?”

The best favor is the one not expected or requested. A true favor comes from the heart. It’s a “token of good will” and requires nothing in return. But if we ask for a favor, aren’t we really saying … “do this thing for me because you are able to do it and when something comes along that I can do for you, I will.”

A true favor is an act of grace and is imparted to someone whether they deserve it not. There should be no expectation of a “return.”

When both of the governors, Festus and Felix, wanted to do a favor for the Jewish leaders by trying and/or condemning Paul, their expectation was that the favor would bring cooperation later on. It was a gesture that would show the Jewish leaders that they wanted a peaceful relationship… no more uprisings.

This is an abuse of the its true nature. But this norm has come down to us in our own time.

Instead of asking for favors, I’m going to look for opportunities to give favors. In order to anticipate a need, it’s important to know a person. A useless item or action is no favor at all. It’s a gratuity.

Keep me mindful today that I might favor those around me in a meaningful way. Amen.

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From Fear to Denial

December 27, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

Fear is a powerful driver. When we are afraid, we may choose to run… or fight… or stand like a deer in the headlights… or just deny anything is happening at all. If nothing is happening, there is no fear. I see now I have chosen denial all along and it has been like a cloud over my life.

Acts 24:25
As Paul discoursed on righteousness, self-control and the judgment to come, Felix was afraid and said, “That’s enough for now! You may leave. When I find it convenient, I will send for you.”

I am a librarian in a small community and I have many responsibilities including service to teens. I try to go to the local high school once or twice a year to talk about good books to read. Just recently, among the books I brought to share with them was a book entitled After by Amy Efaw. This is a disturbing book about a teenage girl who has a baby in her home (alone), wraps the newborn in a black plastic bag, and then discards it in a dumpster. When arrested, she claims she didn’t even know she was pregnant. Before now, I always thought this was absurd.

But, I have discovered this story is not about unwanted teen pregnancy… it’s about denial. The girl was in such denial she could not accept or believe her pregnancy was possible. And of course, once the child was born, the emotional tearing in her spirit was overwhelming. A person in denial will go to extremes even in the face of staggering evidence.

Isn’t this how sin is perpetuated in our lives? Isn’t this how we justify unfaithfulness? Isn’t this how we enter into unhealthy relationships and stay in them? Isn’t this how we drink too much… smoke too much… eat too much? Isn’t this how we rationalize breaking the law? Isn’t this how we put our pain in a box? Isn’t this how we ignore our past and its impact on our actions today? Isn’t this how we get into debt? Isn’t this the seed that births the lie?

Gad, it’s even possible to be in denial about being in denial.

I am not sure where I am going with all this. But I know one thing: I don’t want to live a life of denial anymore. I want the courage to face and walk in truth. I want the freedom that truth can bring to my life. I want self-acceptance.

These are the true roots of joy…. not happiness per se, but joy.

Oh Jesus, as I am on your Way, open my eyes and give me courage.

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Nazarene Sect

December 26, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

If we just call it a “sect” or a “faction” or even a “cult,” we can marginalize everyone within that group. These labels already carry negative connotations without anyone needing to know any actual beliefs or doctrines. It’s a technique for categorizing the world and justifying our actions.

Acts 24:5-6
We [Sanhedrin] have found this man [Paul] to be a troublemaker, stirring up riots among the Jews all over the world. He is a ringleader of the Nazarene sect and even tried to desecrate the temple; so we seized him. [Tertullus, the lawyer, speaking against Paul to Felix, the Governor, in Caesarea]

I have always been intrigued by labels. It’s something that humans do automatically. It’s how we “understand” what we are seeing or hearing. We look at an object and our brain identifies it as a chair or an animal or a tree. And then there are the sub-categories like particular designs of chairs or specific animals or breeds or types of trees. We do this with people too. They are categorized by how they look by skin color, body part shapes, hair color or texture, size, etc. People are also sorted by their sex, clothing, their neighborhood, their country, their language, and their incomes. And of course, they are classified by their associations, whether religious or secular.

But how do we understand or embrace something or someone new? How do we recognize it? If that thing or person does not fit into any of the normal designations, then what is it? Who is it?

I always thought the ancient prophets, whose writings and prophecies are peppered throughout the scriptures, were beleaguered with this categorization problem. They were seeing visions of a future they could not know. How would a primitive person describe an airplane, a rocket, or a space ship? How would they describe an atomic explosion? Are we any better at explaining or understanding miracles?

We use our limited understanding, our own frames of reference. We shove the unfamiliar into the closest or most familiar box. If there is no shape we recognize, we give it shape. We name it.

Jesus was outside the box. He was doing and saying things that made no sense to most of the people he encountered. Paul wasn’t much better.

Christianity of today evolved its own norms. It has taken the recorded words of Jesus and scrutinized, categorized, dissected and analyzed them to the extreme. And yet, when folks start pulling at the edges of Christianity, there is no less resistance than there was in Jesus’s day. We are still afraid of being deluded, of believing a lie, of breaking the law.

But God does not need us to “protect” the truth. God knows the heart.

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30th Anniversary

December 25, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

Thirty years ago, I finished reading the New Testament all the way through for the first time. I had a decision to make. Was it the truth or a lie? I kneeled beside my bed and confessed to this Jesus that the words felt… they resonated like truth. That decision changed my life forever.

Hebrews 5:14
But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.

In some ways, I feel as though I am still on “spiritual milk” and have not matured as I should. After all, it’s been a long time. I have professed followership of Jesus for many, many years. And yet, I still struggle with many of the basics: love, trust, faith, hope…

Perhaps that is the maturity… I recognize I am still struggling. When I was younger in the Lord I can remember attending spiritual retreats where confession was a signature event where we pounded our written sins onto a cross. For many, it was extremely cathartic. But for me, in those early years, I’d struggle with the writing. What should I put on that little piece of paper? What great sin had I committed that still needed to be confessed. Hadn’t I confessed them all by now?

That makes me laugh. These days, I confess my sins daily. They accumulate quickly. I place even the smallest sin at the foot of the cross before that sin can grow, like yeast, to a besetting mountain of emotional pain or denial; before it can darken or harden my heart any more than it already has. And, unfortunately, I confess, some days, it’s the same sin… judging, pride, resentment, self-pity, anger… to name a few familiars.

I understand now, more than ever before, what it means to pray the Jesus prayer, “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy upon me, a sinner.”

My sins are legion, which reminds me of the demoniac [Luke 18:30] who was possessed of many demons. In the same way that many demons can be “swept away,” they can also come back to look for purchase in a newly cleaned “soul.” Sins also reappear [Matthew 12:43-45] to plague the spirit.

This is my message to any believer, young or old: confess often, accept grace and forgiveness daily, and give to others what Christ gives to you.

This is not just the beginning of the church year, it is also the beginning of my own new year in Christ. Continue to teach me, guide me, and renew me. Amen.

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A Young Man’s Courage

December 23, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

Paul had a nephew who was following in his “Pharisee” family tradition apparently. As a result, he was present when the Sanhedrin and 40 men plotted to ambush and kill Paul. That young man, unnamed, changes Paul’s course. Who’s life will I change… who will change mine?

Acts 23:16
But when the son of Paul’s sister heard of this plot, he went into the barracks and told Paul.

Over and over again, I am astounded by the impact of one person’s courage. In a recent post by Seth Godin, he wrote of the power to affect change by corralling 1000 people into action. And I think that is very compelling, but then, I read about the impact of one person in a single moment that changes everything.

If Paul had been ambushed that day, the New Testament would be totally different. Many of Paul’s writings would be lost. His legacy and witness to the gentiles would have been diminished.

And in all of this, Paul had no control whatsoever. He had no idea what was happening. The situation was being molded completely outside of his knowledge.

How many events and people are operating right now that may collide with my own life? Will there be a turn in my future when I go out shopping today? Will someone cross my path who will unlock something critical in my understanding of God… of life? Or will I be the catalyst for someone else? Will I have the courage to act if the situation is dangerous?

I don’t believe Paul’s nephew was a believer or follower of Christ. But he recognized evil and he was moved by his own personal sense of right and wrong; he warned his uncle of the plot. Who knows what else prompted him to act? We’ll never know. Perhaps he loved his uncle… perhaps he spoke to his mother first and her love for her brother trumped everything else. It’s fun to speculate.

Today, I want to be mindful of those around me. Give me courage today to act when necessary. And if I am on the receiving end of a dramatic shift in my circumstances, may I be at peace knowing that this too is within the sovereign will and grace of God. Plus, my change may be the opportunity for someone else to exhibit his/her own courage.

Oh yes, we are woven together. I am grateful for our God, the weaver of life and death.

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Sadducees and Pharisees

December 22, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

This post could have the heading, Protestants and Catholics, or Shi’ite and Sunni, or Orthodox and Reform, that’s how little monotheistic believers have changed over the centuries. One God… and yet, they become divided over the details.

Acts 23:7
When he [Paul] said this, a dispute broke out between the Pharisees and the Sadducees, and the assembly was divided.

Paul used his knowledge of these differences between the sects to show the Roman commander how easily religious fervor could end in violence. The commander had assumed there was something much more sinister behind the attack on Paul and wouldn’t have believed that differences in faith practices could come to blows.

Nothing much has changed. Catholics and Protestants still kill each other in Ireland. Sunnis and Shi’ites kill each other in the Middle East. Orthodox and Reform basically ignore each other but there is plenty of hostile rhetoric.

Who has the truth? Which way is the absolute right way? The Christians will say the Bible is our authority and truth is there. I believe that. And yet, there are more than forty denominations who use the same Bible and interpret it differently. Islam has the Koran and Jews the Torah. But it is not enough to keep them together either.

For a season, everyone is united when there is a common enemy, but as soon as that “enemy” is vanquished, the in-fighting begins anew. Is this the true inheritance of the “tower of babel?” [Genesis 11:9]

Jesus was neither Pharisee nor Sadducee. He was a Jew. He brought to the world the simplicity of two truths: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself. [Luke 10:27] There is no faith, no denomination, no sect, that cannot live by these two truths. They defy interpretations, unless someone wants to split hairs on what love means. But, as humans, born to love, I believe we know how to love. We simply choose not to do it.

This is a good day to love. I can choose to love. Unconditional love does not split hairs. God blesses those who love.

Oh Lord, bless me this day. Teach me. Remind me throughout the day to love.

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Citizenship

December 21, 2009 by Irmgarde Brown

Many take their American citizenship for granted. And although a U.S. citizenship used to carry more weight around the world than it does today, there are still tremendous freedoms that come with it. But there is still another citizenship.

Acts 22:29b
The commander himself was alarmed when he realized that he had put Paul, a Roman citizen, in chains.

In Paul’s time, a Roman citizen had the authority to call on the power of Caesar to intervene if he was being mistreated or maligned. As citizens of heaven, we have the same authority. We can call on the “King of Heaven.” But we have to believe in this government of God. We have to believe the ruler of heaven and earth is responsive. We have to participate as true citizens.

As American citizens, we agree to pay taxes, follow laws, protect our land, and preserve our constitution. The same is true for our citizenship in heaven… we must agree to do the same.

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