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Posts Tagged ‘God’

Artwork by Jo Smith

My mother used to tell me that my name, Irmgarde, meant “guardian of the hearth,” which didn’t do much for me as I didn’t imagine myself a homemaker. In later years, I discovered, my name actually means “guardian of a small enclosure.” This is what God does for my heart too.

II Timothy 1:12b
. . . because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.

Truthfully, I always think of that small enclosure around my set of close friends and family. I imagine a corral and I am standing at the gate, protecting them from harm, from predators. I am grateful that the Holy Spirit is standing just so at the entrance to my deepest places. This is my warrior King.

It’s part of our agreement. As I turn over my stuff and give God access to my closed places within, I am promised Presence.

We have a triune God (at minimum) to help us get a handle on the work that each entity might play: God, omnipotent and sovereign, manages the big picture (the life maps) while Jesus, the Redeemer, became human to empathize and experience life within the context of time and space and to create a Way to unite us with God by endowing us with the Holy Spirit who indwells any who will accept this arrangement, this gift, this promise, this mystery.

We are understood in all those arenas. . . . and probably more.

God embraces the surrendered soul. Jesus modeled surrender.

My challenge? To accept the paradox that surrender is security; surrender is strength; surrender is safety.

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Us. Not just Paul and not just Timothy, us. And just like those two followers of old, we can’t earn a place in the “holy club” either. If God has a purpose and a willingness, then there is also enough grace, because of the work of the Christ, we’re in. And all of this happens “outside of time.”


II Timothy 1:9
He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time, . . .

I know this verse doesn’t really say “outside” of time, but Paul does write “before the beginning of time,” and I ask, what’s the difference? Because if something is before time, then it’s beyond the control and increments of time. It could be happening “now.” Call is not part of time. That’s amazing!

And if call is not part of time, then service to the Christ is also unhampered by the march of the years of my life. I can be used by God when I am 15 or 90. I can manifest the holy life for a minute, a day, or a lifetime. Those moments are not about me and more than likely, no one will necessarily point at my life’s work or example and say, “oh look, a holy life.” My holy life is in the hands of God’s purpose and grace.

I have skipped the previous verse that articulates the importance of suffering as a portion of the call. This aspect is always a challenge to me. Is suffering a testimony to holiness? I know there are some I can attest it’s true, friends who have walked the suffering pain of cancer and many to their death. Their courage and their abiding love for God during their illnesses humble me still today.

Is that time still to come? I don’t know. Will I choose with courage? If I can just hold on to one truth: suffering in time is finite while the holy life is eternal.

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Photo by J P Shuler

First, Paul chastised Timothy for “neglecting the gift” he was given through the laying on of hands and now, with the second letter, he goes one step further and charges him to be more active, to “fan the flame.”

II Timothy 1:6
For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands.

Apparently, it’s possible to kindle and even ignite the gift that is within us. Paul adds three words that must be part of this combustible process: power (that would be the Holy Spirit), love (that would be the Holy Spirit), and self-discipline (uh, in my case, the only way that would happen would be through the Holy Spirit as well).

Sometimes the Holy Spirit is spoken of as a wind [John 3:8, Acts 2:2], and sometimes fire [Luke 3:16, Acts 2:3], and anyone who has a fireplace or is building a campfire knows that you need air and an initial spark to get a fire going.

I am convinced, once again, that it’s the Holy Spirit who is critical to an authentic, passionate, and propagating faith in God and commitment to the Christ, that great mystery of all mysteries.

Come, Spirit, breathe on me. Light the fire again.

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Photo by Nic Mifsud

Who do I call on to affirm or witness my declaration of faith? Do I have the confidence to call on God, “the blessed and only Ruler, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords,” to corroborate my story each day? And yet, that is the only witness that counts. That’s part of the faith agreement.


I Timothy 6:13-14a
In the sight of God, who gives life to everything, and of Christ Jesus, who while testifying before Pontius Pilate made the good confession, I charge you to keep this command [fight the good fight] . . .

There’s an evangelistic phrase that has been beat to death, “If you were arrested for being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you?”

But of course, the answer depends on the human interpretation of our actions. And really, all those other witnesses could say what they want, there is only witness that counts.

I have been in enough churches or para-church organizations and observed a cloud of well-meaning witnesses crucify me and others for saying the wrong thing, for revealing a disapproved behavior or choice, for reading the wrong books or watching the wrong movies or listening to the wrong music. Once, my husband and I left a church only to discover later that we were discussed as having left the true faith by leaving that group and moving on to a different one. (Anne Jackson speaks eloquently of this in her book and blog, Permission to Speak Freely.)

Have I been guilty of being this kind of witness to others? I’d love to say I haven’t, but I know better.

It’s one of the reasons that gossip is so dangerous, it’s a type of witnessing, a “passing” of information with little concern for its accuracy. One of the curses of gossip for me is that hearing it or speaking it has given me the illusion of being on the inside of a matter. If I have “news” that no one else has, I am an insider. When I hear such news, I am being included. What a terrible sham.

I cannot go back, I can only go forward. Today is a new day and today, I open the gates of heart and ask that He be my witness this day.

Lift up your heads, you gates;
be lifted up, you ancient doors,
that the King of glory may come in.
Who is this King of glory?

The LORD strong and mighty,
the LORD mighty in battle.
Lift up your heads, you gates;
lift them up, you ancient doors,
that the King of glory may come in.

Who is he, this King of glory?
The LORD Almighty—
he is the King of glory. [Psalm 24:7-10]

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Contentment can turn into complacency if not tempered by the presence of God. While the drive for monetary success can override smaller, gentler ways and cause discontent, sorrow, or grief. Success, fame, renown . . . they are also cut from the same cloth as the love of money.


I Timothy 6:6, 10
But godliness with contentment is great gain. . . . For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

Two sides of a coin are represented in this brief passage.

On one side, I see the importance of adding godliness to the formula for contentment. So many people have taken contentment to mean “door mat” or satisfaction with misrepresentation. Neither of these are correct. True contentment is wrapped up in trust first and sensitized to the Spirit within that trust wrapper. When we cannot change a situation, then we must trust God to know and impact it in God time. And when we can change a situation, then we must move according to the stirrings from the Holy Spirit, moving at a non-human speed. That’s how contentment and godliness work together.

On the other side of my coin is too much action with the wrong motivation. It’s change for the sake of personal gain alone. It’s living a deception and for this reason, it brings grief, for once the money or fame or notoriety are achieved, truth is lost and in many cases, the people who mattered most are cast away while the secret dream that had nothing at all to do with money is forgotten.

Sometimes, acclaim comes without an expectation or specific desire for it. Sometimes, it’s a by-product because a person acted out of pure motive and devotion. It can happen. But not often.

For me, I have known none all and none. Griefs have come and I have felt the piercings. Mostly, because of my fears of not having money. And so, there is a holding or misuse of money, a drive to protect what I do have. It colors my world and I don’t like it, but I am hard-pressed to let go. I am hard-pressed to experience contentment within the confines of what is: this much money and no more; this lifestyle and not another; this security and not that other one; this way for now and not another way.

Grief comes with loss and how interesting to be warned of loss in the midst of “financial gain.” Another scriptural paradox!

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Words are compelling. They can change someone’s mind or lock in a point of view; they can soothe or they can motivate to action; they can break a heart or heal. Words create and words destroy. Depending on the wielder of those words and the interpreters, meaning can go either way.

I Timothy 6:4b-5a
“. . . He [one against the message of the Christ] has an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions and constant friction between men, . . . ”

Currently, there is quite the controversy over the book, Love Wins, by Rob Bell. Perhaps by now, a few of the attackers of this book have actually read it, but I have a feeling that their minds are made up about the author and will read into those words what they believe are true. In response, they have added more words that are even more controversial, like heretic and apostate and “universalist.” These words are highly charged and challenge anyone who might want to agree with Rob Bell’s proposition as being in equal danger. Each day, I google Rob’s name and his book to find additional essays and points of view. Today, I discovered a well crafted essay from Richard J. Mouw, the President of Fuller Theology, who called Bell’s book one of salvific generosity or a generous orthodoxy, a term popularized by Brian McLaren some years ago (also a controversial author).

And so the battles rage about words and more words. Some are determined to “protect the faith” and some are equally determined to take grace to its limits, expanding the faith.

I am not a theologian nor do I have any authority to speak either way really, except by personal experience. I have written about my mother before who died at 91, in full dementia, and after a long life of mental instability, bitterness, and hardness of heart. But, when it came time for the end of her life, love was there and she had a specific experience of seeing the Christ. How could that be? How could God break through that cloud of confusion? Because, love can win. That love came through me, my husband, my children, my church family, my friends, and my neighbors. That love was three-dimensional, yes, but I believe it was also supernatural.

There is potential for recognition of the Way at any point in a life. We will never know.

When I give my own testimony of how God reached into my own soul, I am always reminded that several people who had known me before my revelation would say, “You? You are a Christian? You are LAST person I would think would ever do that.” And so it was, that I was the last person, like the woman who washed Jesus’s hair with her tears. And so, among the terrorists and killers, the child molesters and liars, the idolaters and the prisoners, I am there too. We are all among the last. And what words are there for us?

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A prayer and a blessing all rolled up into one. It’s a call for guidance and help along the way. It’s a process prayer in the midst of a situation. It’s acknowledging the present while seeking support in the “next step.” And along with this succor comes the presence of love and perseverance.

II Thessalonians 3:5
May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love and Christ’s perseverance.

I want this prayer to be part of my daily mindfulness.

Another reason I like this prayer is that it’s direct and promises an answer from within myself, an answer that I am more likely to understand and hear. So often believers are taught to ask God what to do next. But in this short appeal, we acknowledge that all direction comes from God and will manifest in me.

If God directs my heart, I will know what to do. I will recognize the way.

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