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Posts Tagged ‘change’

Courage to Speak

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , on October 3, 2009| 1 Comment »

Acts 4:13
When they [Sanhedrin] saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.

There are many types of courage and there are many ways to gain courage. Just because one has courage does not mean one does not have fear or uncertainties. Courage is moving through uncertainty, moving on despite the fear. Courage is believing that something else is more important than self-preservation.

Courage comes easier with practice. This is one reason group wilderness experiences, ropes courses, and other challenge building exercises have become so popular. They build an individual’s tolerance for fear and a history of success in the face of fear.

Of course, what requires courage for one person is not the same for another. I enjoy speaking in front of a group unlike many of my friends and colleagues. I can probably say that much of that “courage” comes from my theater background. But, there is also a confidence that comes with a group setting because I rarely have a sense of disapproval from a group. However, put me in a one on one situation where I can read a person’s body language, their expressions, and can observe their dismay or disagreement, I freeze up. It takes great courage for me to say something to an individual that I suspect will cause disagreement or anger or disappointment.

Basically, I want people to like me. Don’t we all? And so often, I have chosen silence in the name of keeping the peace or maintaining a friendly connection. But, in the end, this is giving people a false impression. It’s a lie.

It is my hope that I may grow in courage to be more transparent and authentic… to speak my heart, to speak from love, but honestly… to speak of my faith and why I follow the Christ. That’s all. One does not have to be “schooled” in theology to talk about the power of change and faith.

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Stop and Turn Away

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on September 28, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Acts 2:37b-38
“Brothers, what shall we do?” [the crowd] Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit…”

Repent. It’s become such an inaccessible word over the years. It’s like a joke. How many times have we seen caricatures of “preachers” holding up a bible and shaking it over the crowd: “Repent you sinners!” Who can even hear the real message anymore?

And yet, it’s exactly “repent” that is the core to change. Repent is not just a religious term, it’s a personal experience. It’s a choice. Change… for good or evil… cannot happen without choice.

Personally, I find myself bemoaning over the same sins every day: gossip and judging others (to name two of the most popular). Both are extraordinarily nasty sins and I am ashamed to confess them. But the point here is that shedding these sins is not just about confession and the receiving of forgiveness… there is a point where I must “stop” and do something else instead.

Once, in counseling session some years ago, I was crying over these and other “besetting” sins (as though they have a mind and life of their own) and how I struggled with them. In the end, the revelation was simple: “I didn’t want it badly enough” … I didn’t want to change enough. I didn’t want to stop enough. The benefits of continuing were still outweighing the unknown of stopping. Who would I be if I stop this behavior? Who would I be if I change?

So often, people (including me) are more comfortable with our current state because it’s a “known.” But to change or “repent” means we are moving into an unknown territory. We are pioneering into a future we cannot predict. Fear, doubt, insecurities, anxiety also jump into the fray.

I am a bit of a hypocrite. I say I like change, but really, I mean change around me… I can adapt to that kind of change. But, I’m different when it comes to my own behaviors. Those changes are much easier to avoid.

So, today, one challenge: stop and turn away from gossip. If what I say cannot be said with the person standing there beside me, it shouldn’t be said. End of story.

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Miracles Keep Coming

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , on September 27, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Acts 2:32
“God has raised this Jesus to life, and we are all witnesses of the fact.” [Peter speaking]

If it wasn’t enough that Jesus healed hundreds of people throughout his ministry, fed thousands with very little food, raised people from the dead, and in general, transformed the lives of those who came into contact with him, then he died and rose from the dead himself. That’s a miracle and that’s the point.

Jesus fulfilled the Jewish prophecies about the Messiah throughout his life, from birth to death and resurrection, and yet, unbelief abounded. They had heard of the promised Messiah and how he would bring change and miracles, but when it actually started happening, they said, “not like that.” The miracles (and changes) were not the ones they expected or wanted. Miracles can shake up a person’s world.

Miracles are not always tidy. Miracles challenge the norm. Miracles defy expectations. Miracles are outside of our control.

Of course, not every miracle is the parting of the waters or a blind man being able to see. Some miracles are very basic: people forgiving other people, marriages remade, illness overcome, families restored, addicts staying clean, babies born. Are these anything less than miraculous?

Today I acknowledge and give thanks for the everyday miracles in my life: abundant food to eat, my house and working vehicles, a stable job, a marriage still together despite the odds, my adopted children, my rescued pets, my good health, my faith, my family’s wealth compared to most of the world, my citizenship in a free and prosperous country (as an immigrant family, we could have ended up anywhere), my natural gifts and talents…. all miracles.

Tomorrow will bring something new. Anything can happen. Teach me Lord, to face each and every day with an expectation of your presence: the greatest miracle of all.

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Pick Your Last Days

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 25, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Acts 2:14, 16b-17
Then Peter stood up with the Eleven, raised his voice and addressed the crowd: “Fellow Jews and all of you who live in Jerusalem, let me explain this to you; listen carefully to what I say…. this is what was spoken by the prophet Joel [2:28-29]: ‘In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams….”

When, exactly, are the Last Days? Good luck with that. Theologians and other Christian writers have written volumes about this phenomenon while the Pentecostals and Charismatics have been waving the Last Days banner since the turn of the 19th century. People have been talking about the Last Days for a long time. Is it possible that we’re still in the Last Days? Have the last 2000 years been the Last Days?

In his post-Holy Spirit filling in Acts 2, Peter certainly implied that the Last Days were beginning that day. He saw the outpouring of power and the speaking in tongues (other languages) that day as a sure sign of Joel’s prophecy being fulfilled.

Here are the choices I see: either we are still in the Last Days… or the Last Days haven’t really started yet… or we’re on the other side of the Last Days. Pick your camp!

I think the disciples and newly committed Christ followers in Peter’s time, believed the Last Days were right then and that it was indeed … a matter of days or weeks, at best, before Christ would return and the world would end as they knew it. They lived and died as martyrs because of their commitment to this idea. They lived fully and without compromise.

But, in the same way that Nineveh was spared when Jonah finally did what he was supposed to do, e.g. warn Nineveh’s residents of coming destruction if they didn’t change… so has the world has been spared… for now. We are still here.

But are we paying attention to the Joels and Jonahs of our own age? Are we reading the signs of warning? Are we taking seriously that we may be on borrowed time?

There are still men and women today prophesying… seeing visions… and dreaming dreams. Their words speak of spiritual deserts, economic chaos, environmental collapse, human suffering at the hands of evil, starvation and traumatic illness.

Not everyone can be a prophet or a watchman on the wall, but we can be listeners. We can change our own small world. We can love our neighbor and love our environment. We can pray for change. We can pray for healing.

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Grief in Change

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , on August 24, 2009| Leave a Comment »

John 16:6
“…Because I have said these things, you are filled with grief…”

It couldn’t have been easy listening to Jesus tell the disciples that he was leaving. If they were grieving, they were also believing… he wasn’t kidding. From their perspective, the most amazing experience of their lives was ending.

They were so disappointed. They were not so savvy (in fact, far from it), to be able to see the big picture or expect it could possibly be better than it had already been with Jesus. Not possible!

Grief is one of the strongest emotions that humans feel. It can be overwhelming. Sometimes, it is so intense that a person becomes numb, removed from life and unable to carry on daily activities. Grief is a reaction to loss. Grief is a reaction to change.

On this occasion, the disciples were feeling “anticipatory grief” which strikes in the face of an anticipated loss or change. Jesus was helping them identify what they were feeling. He was also trying to prepare them for the next phase of their lives as his followers.

God is about change because God is creative. And so is life. When we hold too tightly to what is now, we will find change more difficult. We will dig in our heels and try to slow down the process.

There is nothing inherently wrong with grief. It’s the emotional process of accepting change in our lives. But we cannot remain there or we’ll miss the next stage of our life’s trajectory.

I embrace change and I embrace the feelings that go with it. It’s my personal “creation” story.

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Pruning or Cutting

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , on August 16, 2009| Leave a Comment »

John 15:2
“He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.”

Do I know the difference? I’m not sure I do. Conceptually I understand. Pruning is supposed to be that little snip here and there, deadheading, and shaping, while cutting is chopping off a dead branch or even more drastic, the whole top of something and starting over. One action is a hopeful trim while the other is not so hopeful, more resignation I’d say. Oh sure, there are times that a major cutting happens and the plant regroups and sprouts all over again, but how often does that happen?

My husband and I have always wanted a willow tree, but we’re too cheap to just go out and buy one. So, he keeps coming up with these little willow tree sprigs and shoots to try and generate some roots from them… either in a jug a water or sticking them directly in the ground (according to “his” daddy, this is possible). Anyway, to make a long story short, none of these methods have worked to date. That is, until the last one. He stuck it in the ground (we have a very wet area of our yard) and no surprise, the little thing up and died. So we didn’t bother to prune it, we just cut it down. Guess what? That little guy interpreted that action completely differently. For that little willow, it was pruning, and up from nothing, came a healthy willow branch, ready to face the world. Go figure.

What’s the lesson here? Anything is possible. Pruning and cutting can look the same sometimes but it’s what the plant does with it that matters.

When an idea or a planned future is cut off from out lives, how are we interpreting it? I have assumed that broken dreams were God’s way of saying, “no, not that!” But really, it’s possible that it was just a re-direction. It was really a pruning… maybe it felt like cutting because I had carried the plan along too far without checking in. Who knows?

I know I’m in Christ. I’m in the plant… the vine. And if that’s the case, it’s all pruning, every change out of my control and in God’s control has tremendous potential. I think it’s time to really embrace the shifts and snips.

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Head in the Sand

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , on August 14, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Luke 9:45
“But they did not understand what this meant. It was hidden from them, so that they did not grasp it, and they were afraid to ask him about it.”

I often accuse my son of putting his head in the sand. He has responsibilities and chores and tasks that should be accomplished, but he procrastinates. Whatever is happening in the moment trumps these more mundane concerns. But, as the mother, these are important matters. They are small but they add up, everything from taking out the trash, feeding the animals, or washing his clothes to getting his driver’s license and paying his bills. He still doesn’t seem to “get it.”

The disciples, apparently, weren’t doing much better. Jesus told them he was going to be betrayed and they didn’t understand. I cannot help but wonder why. This was not the first time Jesus had mentioned it.

Granted, some things were purposefully hidden from the disciples as well as the crowds, but they could have pursued this train of thought. They chose not to and basically, I think they “didn’t want to know.” This is the essence of putting our heads in the sand. We don’t want to know or hear the truth.

Am I really that much different from them … or my kids? It’s just different sand.

As parents, we are often saying to our teens, “don’t tell me, I don’t want to know.” Somehow, we fear that the knowing will bring painful responsibility or will place huge demands upon us. If we “know,” then we may have to act, we may have to choose, we may have to confront ourselves and those around us. We may have to do something we don’t want to do.

Why do we assume that the truth of a situation will always be a bad thing? It’s equally possible that by procrastinating or ignoring a situation, we are missing the good stuff too.

I want to be present today. I’m taking my own head out of the sand and taking a good look around. It’s time. It’s time to start asking questions, to clarify, to understand. It’s time to see what’s really happening.

As Julian of Norwich said, “All will be well, and all will be well, and all manner of things will be well.”

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