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Posts Tagged ‘trust’

Idolatry Obstructs Resurrections

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 14, 2011| Leave a Comment »

Becoming is a series of resurrections. In order to optimize the resurrections of the heart, soul & mind, there must be deaths–crucifixions, to be specific. But a number of hindrances to the deaths as well as the awakenings play out in my life. Categorically, the biggest obstacle is idolatry.

Colossians 3:3-5
For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry.

This type of idolatry is not just worshiping a statue or foreign god, it’s putting Self up on a pedestal. The earthly nature illustrated in this verse (immorality, impurity, sex, evil desire and greed), is all about self-pleasure and choices made without concern or care for the other. Idolatry is another way of acting out extreme narcissism.

To crucify or “kill” these tendencies, desires, and controlling habits, I must first be willing. Jesus gave us the way to the cross. It didn’t seem very fair at the time. And it was a painful process, a breaking down of everything. His body was stripped of all protections. He was laid bare both physically and mentally.

Can I lay bare my own ego that wants to defy the Spirit and doesn’t want to understand or trust the paradox of faith in a Christ? Sexual behaviors and addictive pursuits are not the only features of an earthly nature. I have other consuming thoughts like ambition, notoriety, fame, power, wealth, and control. These too must be crucified before they can become the seed that dies and transforms into a thriving plant or tree. [John 12:24]

This remains unknown territory. I must willingly walk my personal “Via Dolorosa” and encourage my ego to let go of the survival skills I have developed over the years out of pain and fear and abandonment. They push people away. They block the free flowing release of the Spirit within. And what’s on the other side of crucifying the old ways? The old idolatries? I don’t really know. I only have a promise and a faith in the One within.

But I do know this: until that earthly nature loses its grip on my life, I’ll never know the truth of a truly resurrected life. They cannot live together.

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Cancellations and Disarmament

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , on January 10, 2011| 2 Comments »

Forgiveness cancels and disarms. Cancellations are not easy; they imply change. They bring to mind a huge stop sign. Something that was planned and moving forward, is no more. All gone. Disarmament is not much different: whatever weapons we carry, we lay down . . . willingly and by agreement.


Colossians 2:13b – 15a
He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross. . . having disarmed the powers and authorities . . .

If I forgive you, I lay down my weapons and I cancel the plans I had toward you. If you forgive me, the same thing happens: I lay down my dagger and I remove the pay-backs. Everything stops. The old way is done. The previous mistakes, hurts, anger, frustrations, or attacks are no longer an option.

That’s how it’s supposed to work.

Another word is reprieve. It’s like standing before a firing squad or sitting in the electric chair, and someone comes in and says it’s over, no strings attached. Freedom.

You would think the reprieved criminal would be appreciative and transformed. Not always. Sometimes, he/she is cut loose and soon repeats the same actions, the same mistakes, the same crimes.

Are we much different? Am I? I have been reprieved as well. My Spirit has been awakened and I am in relationship with the Holy Christ Spirit. I am forgiven for my mistakes and I have been set free from layers and layers of synthetic and man-made theories, laws, rules, and interpretations.

These layers are a cage and although the work has been done (for everyone), I still have to step out of that cage to experience the freedom. I have to trust that no one will slam the cage door shut. I have to trust that the cancellation and disarmament are real. I have to believe. I have to operate in a new way. Caged life is different from meadow life.

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Circumcised by Christ

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 8, 2011| Leave a Comment »

That should get your attention. It got mine. The symbolism begins with the origin of the word: cutting around. This rite is performed by Jews, Muslims, and many Christians. Its been in practice for centuries. Circumcising the heart and soul, not so long.

Colossians 2:11-12
In him you were also circumcised, in the putting off of the sinful nature, not with a circumcision done by the hands of men but with the circumcision done by Christ, having been buried with him in baptism and raised with him through your faith in the power of God, who raised him from the dead.

By aligning myself with Christ, by submitting to Christ’s sacrifice and resurrection, I am allowing Christ to complete that process by cutting around and cutting off, the coverings of my heart and soul. I am laying myself open and bare to Holy Spirit. I am different.

The longer we wait for spiritual circumcision, just like physical circumcision, the more painful it becomes. Adult men who choose to be circumcised have a long recovery (up to six weeks) as well as the potential for unforeseen complications and infection. Spiritual circumcision is no different because we resist the process. We become used to the way it was. We may know we don’t have a robust relationship with the Christ Spirit and we understand intellectually that this circumcision is necessary to really experience and feel the Spirit, but we cower under the threat of pain and discomfort. The pain comes from what we try to hold onto and the habits that secure the layers of narcissism.

I’m afraid, unlike physical circumcision which is a permanent change, spiritual circumcision is not so everlasting. We have to actual pay attention and participate. It’s not strictly passive. I think my heart and soul have been covered over by my fears, my disappointments, my anger, and so forth. I’ve had a series of circumcisions of the heart.

I can only be grateful that Jesus is a good, kind, and patient medicine man.

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By Him and For Him

Posted in Christmas Through Epiphany, tagged , , , , , , , , , on December 31, 2010| Leave a Comment »

I confess, I don’t like this idea in general, that God’s supernatural creativity might be, in some way, self-serving. Instead, I would like to ponder his generosity, his love, his willingness to create . . . for me!

Colossians 1:16
For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him.

Aren’t my own prayers ultimately self-serving? Help me be a better parent (for my kids is it? or for my success vs. failure as a mother?); give me favor at my work (so that the business will grow or people will love and congratulate me?); help resolve our financial situation (to show God’s power in this area or help me get out of debt so I can buy something else?).

I need to get over any kind of surprise that God, all God, all knowing, powerful and present in all things, can operate in His will and not only will it please himself, it will please me as well . . . if I let it. If I trust God, if I go with the flow of God’s spirit in and through both my invisible and visible life.

There is a story of a human who questioned God’s right to do as God wishes. His name is Job and it takes 42 chapters to get to the essence of it. God is sovereign. God is God. That’s just how it is.

I can either fight God and walk against the wind or row upstream or I can yield to God. Pretty simple really.

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Move the Mind

Posted in Christmas Through Epiphany, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 26, 2010| Leave a Comment »

Photo from Flickzzz

A two-part requirement is implicated in the advice of Phil 4:8 — First I must recognize what is true, virtuous and lovely while I consciously decide to “think on these things.” I must choose to move my mind there. And secondly I must put what I know into practice.

Philippians 4:8-9
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

This is one of those core messages from scripture, a bare bones instruction that can be followed and if, I could exercise such a truth, my world would be better.

This lesson is taught in secular circles as well. My daughter struggles with emotional swings that are fueled by her raging thoughts, sometimes from her difficult past before we adopted her and sometimes from her daily struggles. In any event, these mind games steal her sleep, her well-being, and her confidence. The process of moving the mind to another place is a discipline she is trying to learn, but it’s a slow kind of progress, the two steps forward and one step back kind of schlep through life.

But am I any different just because I understand it better? I do a lot of replays in my mind and I find my mind pulling up old scripts all the time. The holidays are often the worst: “Why does Christmas cheer depend on me?” “Why am I always placating everyone else?” “Why do I end up doing all the cooking, wrapping, cleaning, and planning?” “Can’t anyone help me pick up some pieces of the weight of our responsibilities?” “Will we always struggle financially?” “I don’t want to be poor again.”

Every one of these inner questions is laden with stories and history and images that can replay forever, if I allow them to start. They go from some sort of righteous indignation through a variety of pity parties to fear. It’s a sad, downward spiral. These are the gifts of an undisciplined mind.

And so, I must choose to set these thoughts, and others aside for a time when they can be addressed in the safety of my inner counselor, when my connection to Spirit is strong and lush. Not before.

Another trouble begins however if I don’t remember the second part: the practice of what I know. This is the part that supports my inner health so I’m not just putting my mind and my head in the sand forever. It is the practice of what I know that gives me the ability to move my mind both to AND from the harder elements of life on this earth.

Writing and praying and reading, these are three of the key disciplines in my life.

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For Everything

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on November 13, 2010| Leave a Comment »

This is pretty straightforward: give thanks for everything. But, over the years, I have lost the context of this phrase and as a result, it has become cliche. Why do I give thanks? To be filled with the Holy Spirit–to experience relationship with the Holy Spirit.

Ephesians 5:20
. . . always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Giving thanks is a type of submission, an agreement with the giver. When I give thanks, I am in partnership with the God who I have invited to guide my life. I may not understand what is happening, but this mandate insures I enter my life with open eyes.

This is my life today. These are my burdens. This is my joy. This is my sorrow.

And when I scorn these gifts? I grieve the Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit was given to me to “have my back.” There is nothing in my life that cannot be faced with the Holy Spirit–it’s God within, for heaven’s sake. That’s the promise. That’s the whole point.

So, now the real challenge: God teaches and I am asked to practice this day. Not in any fake way, but truly, with understanding, I give thanks for this day.

(FD 7)

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Intentional Redemption

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 11, 2010| Leave a Comment »

Whatever God gives, it’s given on purpose: salvation, forgiveness, healing, anointing, power, revelation, and more. All of these gifts are given according to his understanding of what is needed, when and why. Our leap of faith is accepting the timing.

Ephesians 1:7-8
In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.

It’s a trust issue. Do I trust God to give me what I really need or am I always looking for God to give me what I want in the moment?

And why is it so hard for me to remember that what I already have was given in the same spirit? I was redeemed 32 years ago. I had an epiphany, a revelation of the Christ and the necessity for the veil to be taken down. I was offered a relationship with God that was unlike any other relationship I had or would ever have in this 3-D world. I was invited to partake of the universal “Body.”

I needed that moment back then. And now, along the way, oh God, help me to see the other moments. Help me to recognize the gifts you gave and to return thanks. Help me to appreciate this path instead of complaining about the conditions of the way. There are so many other ways things could have gone.

If I were totally surrendered to your wisdom and understanding, I would know true joy. I still can, right? The invitation has never been snatched away. Today is just another example of the story we are making of my life.

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