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Posts Tagged ‘truth’

O, My Uncircumcised Heart

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 20, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Acts 7:51
You stiff-necked people, with uncircumcised hearts and ears! You are just like your fathers: You always resist the Holy Spirit!

It’s such a temptation to use a public forum like this to pontificate about the condition of the church or the condition of all the “others” who are not in God’s will or plan. But today I realize again how important it is for me to show my own heart. Oh sorrow, it is buried again beneath the layers of self-deception.

The heart is tricky because it regrows layers even after it’s been circumcised. These regrown layers may start out very thin and almost indiscernible at first, but eventually, layer upon layer forms and the heart is back to where it was before the Holy Spirit touched it. As the layers accumulate, the hardness begins to set in and although the mind and body can go through the motions of worship and service, the heart is no longer involved.

Some of the symptoms: a cavalier attitude toward corporate worship, missing times with God, a quick temper, a judgmental cattiness, overwhelming tiredness, forgetfulness, looking for change for the sake of change, putting others under the microscope, dropping responsibilities, indulging the body, resisting the Holy Spirit, just to name a few.

I don’t think I’m at the totally hardened stage yet … obviously, or I wouldn’t be writing today.

Psalm 51:17 says, “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” It’s really quite simple, acknowledge what is happening and be chastened by the truth of it. It goes right along with repent. It goes right along with choice.

God does not come in with a sledge hammer or a fancy butcher knife to do heart work. Instead, like a child who runs to a parent and shows the injury, God brings comfort and then gently removes the harmful effects. God cleans the layers of dirt and grime and if necessary, the scab that his holding in infection. God uses truth with love.

I don’t like being vulnerable. I don’t like placing myself in places where I might get hurt. I hide my fears with layers of humor and bravado and chameleon-esque behaviors. In this way, I can keep people out of the tender places, I can control the connections. I know how to hide.

Oh, “refiner’s fire,” come and burn away the dross. Give me courage to be transparent and authentic. Give me courage to accept my tender places.

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Wisdom and Opportunity

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , on October 14, 2009| 1 Comment »

Acts 7:9b-10
But God was with him [Joseph] and rescued him from all his troubles. He gave Joseph wisdom and enabled him to gain the goodwill of Pharaoh king of Egypt; so he made him ruler over Egypt and all his palace.

They go hand in hand, wisdom and opportunity. It is opportunity that gives expression to wisdom.

I have missed so many opportunities to do or say something because of lack of wisdom. I simply did not know or recognize the moment of decision or worse, I recognized it too late.

In college, I was in a sorority and apparently, many of the sisters were active in Campus Crusade for Christ. At the same time that they started having meetings in our rec room, I started dating. I passed up several opportunities to attend one of those meetings in order to go out or hang out with my new boyfriend. Who would I be today if I had met Christ as a young adult?

In Chicago, when I was trying to get “into” the theater scene, I had my choice of small theater companies with which to align. I didn’t really think about it much nor consider my options and as a result, I chose unwisely. I missed out on working at the Steppenwolf Theatre that has since become part of the bedrock of professional theater in Chicago founded by such icons as Gary Sinise and John Malkovich.

The list goes on. We all make choices that redirect our lives. Granted, there is no way to know which road is really best. Hindsight is always easier than foresight.

But wisdom is a gift of God. And today, I have no excuse for missing a God-created opportunity. If I pursue my opportunities with prayer and meditation first, then I will be ready to choose.

O Lord, give me discernment and sensitivity to the circumstances of my life today and may wisdom be my sister-friend, whispering truth into my heart and soul.

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Leader Followers

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , on September 24, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Acts 1:20
“For,” said Peter, “it is written in the book of Psalms, ” ‘May his place be deserted; let there be no one to dwell in it,’ and,” ‘May another take his place of leadership.’

And then they prayed, cast lots, and replaced Judas Iscariot (one of the twelve who had betrayed Jesus) with Matthias.

Only after Jesus resurrected did the disciples begin to realize they were no longer just followers of Jesus, they were now the de facto leaders of those who had been following Jesus throughout his ministry (upwards to 120 people were gathered that day alone). Jesus had not just selected them to be his close friends and students, they were being trained for the ongoing task of bringing his kingdom to Earth.

Jesus spent a lot of time showing them what it means to be a leader. It is not about having the seats next to Jesus or sitting in the place of honor at table [Luke 22:24-30]. A leader must first learn how to follow and how to serve before he can effectively lead.

In recent years, the idea of Servant Leadership has become a business buzz phrase and espouses the same principles. Another phrase, Leader Follower, is very similar. Jesus had both of these ideas down pat.

I think I am doing pretty well with these concepts until my feelings are tromped because I haven’t been acknowledged for a job well done or when one of my good ideas is adopted by the organization without recognition. Then, I am smacked in the face by the personal myth I have created about myself. I am no better than the Zebedee brothers hoping to find favor above the others [Matthew 20:20-28]. But Jesus chided them saying they did not realize what it meant to be his kind of leader… there must be a willingness to sacrifice, to let go, to be misunderstood, to be unappreciated, to be faithful to truth, to be humble, and to trust God through it all. This is the cup of leadership. This is the cup of followership.

Guide me this day to lead with humility and follow with promise.

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Cost of Betrayal

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 11, 2009| Leave a Comment »

John 19:11b
“…Therefore the one who delivered Me to you has the greater sin.” [Jesus speaking to Pilate]

Although Jesus knew that one of his followers would betray him, the suffering was still heavy to bear. Imagine, in this scene, Jesus tells Pilate that Judas, who betrayed him, has committed a greater sin than Pilate who would be condemning Jesus to death. I believe the chief priests, who brought Jesus to Pilate, were also betrayers. They twisted the truth to achieve their own goals. As leaders of the faith, they betrayed the people.

I have experienced betrayal and I can testify to the depth of such pain. To give someone trust, to open the heart and expose it willingly to someone, and then have it crushed through betrayal is a misery like no other.

Love is a contract. Relationship is a contract. Friendship is a contract. It may not be a written one, like a marriage vow or certificate, and yet, as the onion layers of our hearts are removed in order to love more deeply, we are placing more and more trust in that contract. Contracts of this kind are strengthened by our transparency and destroyed by lies and deception.

And yet, love requires that we accept the possibility of betrayal. This is the greatest challenge of all. Once injured by betrayal, the tendency is to protect the heart from another incursion. But love is anemic without trust and vulnerability. It is not love at all.

Jesus loved Judas despite the eventual betrayal. Jesus loved all the disciples, knowing they would fail him and flee. Jesus loved Peter who denied him three times in a single night.

Our only safety in loving others is Christ. He is the healer of betrayed hearts. Without his presence within the heart, we will develop a heart of stone. It all starts innocently enough, a protective shield from the disappointments and betrayals we have experienced over the years, but eventually, if left to our own devices, the protective layer begins to soak through and our hearts are hardened. This is the highest cost of betrayal.

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart…” [Psalm 51:17a] The heart of stone must be broken in order for healing to begin. [Ezekiel 36:26]

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Accused of Lying

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , on September 9, 2009| Leave a Comment »

John 19:7
“We have a law, and according to that law he must die, because he claimed to be the Son of God.”

The gospel of John is all about identity. Is Jesus who he said he was or not? This is the ultimate question.

The priests who brought Jesus before Pilate were very clear about his claims. They accused him of intentionally misleading people. They accused him of breaking the law, the law given to them from God through Moses and the prophets. They called him a liar.

There are really very few choices when confronting the identity of Jesus: either he is who he says he is, he’s stark raving mad, or he’s lying.

In today’s world, we don’t have anything similar. If a regular “Joe” was to claim he was God or just claim he was the President, all would assume he was crazy as a bedbug. Even if we determined the person was a consummate liar, his mental stability would be suspect. We don’t ever entertain the idea that he might be the “real deal.”

The priests were no different. There was simply no way that Jesus (of Nazareth) could be telling the truth, it had to be trick. From their perspective, the guy was a sinister, manipulative, liar who had duped the people by healing them, eating with them, feeding them, and teaching them about the kingdom of God being available to them… right from where they were. He was way outside their comfort zone. That couldn’t be God.

And isn’t that what many way today?

When I became a follower of Christ, I made it quite clear that I didn’t want to be a “Christian.” I had no good memories or experiences with the people who claimed to be his disciples. But I did see and believe in the One. And this is where my journey began, with my eyes on Christ alone. I trusted the rest would fall into place along the way. There were tons of things I couldn’t understand or agree with in scripture, but I could not call this Jesus a liar.

When I prayed that first prayer, there was no one leading the way. I simply asked Jesus if I could follow him and become more like him. I confessed. I believed he was who he said he was. That’s all. Because I knew, if that was true, then there was more truth to be uncovered. This is the way of Jesus… from truth to truth, from understanding to understanding.

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Is There an Evil One?

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , , , on September 2, 2009| Leave a Comment »

John 17:15
“My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one.” [Jesus praying]

Is there an evil one? You’re kidding! On what planet are you living? Of course there is an evil one and he/she is having a party down here.

The question is how do we engage evil.

According to Jesus, truth is the great weapon against evil [vs 17]. Harumph! We don’t use that tactic much. I think we try other things instead: isolating ourselves from evil, condemning evil, running away from evil, lumping evil in with a lot of other things, avoiding evil, and worst of all, pretending evil doesn’t exist.

In order for truth to have power, it must have complete foothold within our being. We must take a stand within before we can venture forth. We must choose honestly, love honestly, act honestly, speak honestly. Here is where truth begins. It is out of this truth that we can become equipped to engage the evil one. This is the power of union with Christ. This is the point. We can only be honest with ourselves when we are authentic with the Christ within.

The evil one uses guerrilla warfare, secret agents, emotional manipulation, and brainwashing. It’s scary out here. I take hold of truth today in my heart, soul, and mind.

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Belonging

Posted in Ordinary Time, tagged , , , , , , , on August 30, 2009| Leave a Comment »

Psalm 24:1; John 17:6a
The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it…
“I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me…” [Jesus]

This “belonging” business is not easy for those of us from a contemporary culture. First of all, there’s the negative side of belonging advanced by slavery and other human trafficking. That idea doesn’t sit well with us: someone owning another person. Nor is there any appeal for being treated as a trading card, traded up or down. Actually, most teen angst is centered around belonging … or rather, not belonging to a particular group or clique.

Fortunately, there’s the nicer side of belonging, like belonging to a family, a club, a church, a neighborhood, a team, or a community. Then, we may feel a lot cozier and comfortable with the notion. Or talk to any two young lovers and they’ll happily embrace the idea of belonging to one another.

The concept of belonging or not belonging can be powerful stuff.

But I’m thinking these verses from John 17 are more inclusive, particularly when combined with Psalm 24. Everything and everyone belongs to God who gave this kingdom to Jesus with the mandate of bringing the people of Earth back to God. Earlier in the chapter [vs 4], Jesus said he accomplished this task. The transfer of power has been completed. The turnabout began back then. The next part of the story is ours… receiving what Jesus offers and integrating the truth of Jesus into our lives.

In verse 10, Jesus says again that everything that God has is His and everything that Jesus has is God’s. But the same is true for us. Everything that Jesus has can be ours and vice versa. We belong to Him already.

To resist Jesus is like saying we don’t want to be human anymore. But we belong to each other too. Let’s start acting like it.

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